Coronation Street Catch Up: the devious, mucky cow edition

your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

Hey Miles!

How dare you knock Rev. Billy to the ground!

How's he supposed to stand up when he's wearing those tight pants?

 

It's just the latest installment of the biblical battle between Noah (religious conversion therapist) and Rev. Billy (gay man of the cloth). Billy and Todd confront Noah (who is now getting it on with Theo's wife and playing happy families with Danielle, Miles and Millie). As the two church men swap quotes from the bible, Miles pushes Billy and Billy falls on his back on the cobbles. Where will it all end?

 

Of course Theo's no saint as he continually oscillates between rage and self-pity and is determined to sabotage Todd's friendship with Billy. 

 

Elsewhere, the long goodbye continues for Aadi who is being dispatched to Mumbai to do who knows what with cousin Vikram. Dev (whose brilliant idea it was to exile his son for past misdeeds) is now having second thoughts at the thought of Aadi leaving.

 

Meanwhile Asha is having a difficult time adjusting to her job as a paramedic and now having panic attacks and flashbacks. Asha desperately wants Aadi to stay but has yet to express her feelings to him.

 

Bernie remains absent as she is on her solo honeymoon (how does that work? Does she get a cut rate on the honeymoon suite? Does she carry herself over the threshold?)

 

But the big news of the week is Tracy (and Abi and Carl). Tracy's snooping finally pays off as she spies Carl and Abi smooching. Tracy is delighted and confronts the torrid twosome. But, because Tracy is a generous and kindly person, she offers to stay quiet for the princely sum of 10K (she needs the money to pay for her divorce from Steve).

 

Abi tries to convince Tracy to stay quiet but no dice. Carl then engages Brody to help him do some illegal car-related activity in order to generate the money he needs to pay off Tracy. Coincidentally (or not), Dev and Aadi are shocked to find that Aadi's car has been stolen and was involved in a crash.

 

Dee Dee finally reveals everything to Ollie regarding her baby and Joel. She expects Ollie to break off their budding romance but Ollie doesn't seem deterred. Meanwhile, Dee Dee is also working on Ollie's legal file that maintains his car accident was caused by a faulty MOT.  Hmm, sounds like the work of quasi-mechanic Carl...

 

And now for some quotes from the week that was:

 

Abi to Carl who prefers snogging to breakfast:

"What about the toast?"

(no thanks, we don't want crumbs in the bed) 

 

Carla's suggestion to Lisa to punish David for crimes against recycling:

"Nip and get your Taser and zap him between the legs"

(don't give her any ideas) 

Tracy spies Abi and Carl snogging through a translucent door of the kitchen.

"You devious, mucky cow"

(you'll have to be more specific) 

 

Tracy again:

"If you're thinking of having a secret tryst with your brother's wife, try not to do it in front of a see-through door"

(snappy aphorism. Get that printed on a t-shirt) 

 

Tracy to Abi re: Carl:

"What's he like in bed?"

(horizontal, I would think) 

Abi to Tracy:

"My heart beats quicker when I see Carl"

(must be the coffee from Roy's)

 

Tracy to Abi re: her relationship with Tommy O.: 

"It was exciting but it didn't last"

(she got kicked into touch by a footballer) 

 

Noah to Miles re: Billy and Todd:

"The Bible does say that animals travel in twos"

(but you and Miles also travelling in twos) 

***

Well fellow Kebab Kolleagues, so ends another week. Will Aadi actually leave for Mumbai or will there be a last minute change of plan? Inquiring minds (and British Airways) want to know. Thanks so much for spending time here at the Hip and, as always, have a great week.  

Coronation Street Catch Up: the blow dry boy edition

 your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street... 

 

 

Well, well... Kale has finally made its appearance on Coronation Street (in a good way) probably for the first time in the show's history.

 

The robust, leafy green is an essential ingredient in Debbie's new, healthy smoothie (along with cucumber and avocado), part of Debster's new healthy lifestyle. But, at the same time, Deb is contending with the stresses of her hotel business (assisted by Ryan) and the well-meaning (but unwelcome) interventions of her fiance, Ronnie.

 

Speaking of 'hotel business', this seems to be the location of Carl's Canoodling Chamber (aka the hotel room where he's currently residing). While scheduling a legover with Abi, Carl is ambushed by libidinous Tracy. Carl wards off Torrid Trace with a phony 'dicky tummy' story. (BTW, 'Dicky Tummy' is also the name of my accountant). 

 

However, Carl is miffed when he discovers Abi has had martial relations with (wait for it) her husband! How dare she! Carl is even more miffed when he discovers Abi is heading off on vacation to sunny climes with Kev et famille. As a petty revenge tactic, Carl arranges a date with Tracy to make Abi jealous... and it seems to be working.

 

Over at Underworld, Sarah's plan to use a sultry sales pitch on a potential customer falls flat. Not only that, but the customer (Eli) also accuses Sarah of sexual harassment. Maybe the fact that Eli was harassed by a zealous copper (Kit) had something to do with it. 

 

Speaking of Kit, seems David's vendetta with the Brobdingnagian bobby is heating up. David ambushes Eli and tells him that Kit is a rogue copper and that Eli should report him. Meanwhile Kit's boss (Costello) assigns Kit to desk duty so he can "protect" him - whatever that means. Lisa has her suspicions but hasn't yet figured out what's going on between Costello and Kit.

 

Dee Dee wants to work part-time for Adam and suggests that Adam hire Alya to help out at the law firm. Adam isn't sure that the new arrangement will work. At the same time, Dee Dee is interested (romantically) in a new client but resists the idea of pursuing a relationship because of her past history with Joel.

 

Elsewhere, Steve's unwelcome stay at Ty and Fiz's comes to an abrupt end after his babysitting assignment with Dorin ends in a panic. Dorin can't be found (Steve thought Dorin might have hidden in an old fridge that was carted away to the dump) but fortunately Dorin turns up in the backyard.  The whole episode provides a diversion for Carl to destroy Hope's phone which contains an incriminating photo of him and Abi. 

 

But Carl's exploits could all be for nought as Tracy finally figures out that the object of his desire... is Abi.

One can only hope that Tracy's integrity and discreet personality will prevail and she'll keep this information to herself.

 

...I'm kidding of course. 

 

I'm sure the news will be all over the Street before you can say "hotpot".

 

And now for a few lines from the week that was: 

 

Sarah justifies her sexy sales pitch : 

"We sell underwear to mainly men"

(you mean men are wearing Underworld knickers?) 

 

Tracy tells Carl why she's up for a legover:

"Bad things happen when I'm bored"

(bad things also happen when she's not bored)

Debbie reveals her recipe for smoothies: 

"It's kale, avocado and cucumber"

(What? No bacon barm cake?) 

Kit tells David to get lost:

"Jog on blow dry boy"

(wasn't that the name of Batman's other sidekick?) 

Tracy guesses the name of Carl's secret love:

"She wears overalls and stinks of motor oil"

(it's either Ty in drag or Abi) 

Carla to Deb and Lisa:

"I'm not brittle, heartless or jaded"

(despite what it says on her business card) 

Abi to Carl re: their secret tryst: 

"The whole thing's a death wish"

(it is now that Tracy knows about it) 

Shona warns David to stop winding up Kit:

"I will put your head in the fryer if you don't leave him alone"

(that could improve his hair style) 

Cassie wants Steve to repeat his sexy dance at Dev's stag:

"I'll be your pole"

(you mean like Lech Wałęsa or Chopin?) 

***

Well, fellow Street savants, so ends another week. I can only imagine what mayhem will ensue now that Tracy has guessed the name of Carl's legover partner. Thanks for the pleasure of your company here at the Hip. Have a great week!

Coronation Street Catch Up: the tonsil tennis edition

 your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

So let me get this straight.

 

Dev thinks that's Aadi's problems stem from a lack of fatherly love and support... so the solution is to provide even less fatherly love and support - by shipping Aadi off to Mumbai. 

 

Huh.

 

Dev's strange solution comes after Aadi finally confesses the whole extent of his misdeeds (large business losses, fake robbery, crazy party and, finally, the unfortunate drug incident involving Lauren).

 

The whole Aadi situation puts a damper on the Dev/Bernie wedding at the Bistro - but not as much as Bernie's sudden illness and breathing problems (the result of allergies caused by the bridal bouquet). Fortunately the couple overcomes this minor hiccup and enters into marital bliss - despite the fact that Bernie covered up Aadi's debts, tried to skim off wedding money to cover Aadi's debts, and tried to get Brody hired to run Dev's fish and chip shop).   

 

One bright light for Aadi is the fact that he and Amy finally get together. All is peachy until Lauren decides to tell police that Aadi spiked her drink at that fateful party. This prompts Lauren to confront Aadi about his lies and duplicity which then causes Amy to doubt Aadi's integrity and honesty.

 

Meanwhile, over at the builders yard, Theo decides to do a little violent re-arranging of tools and equipment as he rages over Noah and how he ruined his life and usurped his family. Gary is sympathetic to Theo's plight and vows to teach Noah a lesson but is interrupted but the unexpected arrival of Maria.

Over at cringe-worthy love central (aka Steve and Cassie), Steve urges Cassie to let him stay at the home of Ty and Fiz. This after Steve moves out of Ken's place due to Tracy's deceit during divorce proceedings. Ty reluctantly agrees but Fiz is none too thrilled especially with all the 'snogging Olympics' going on whenever Steve and Cassie are within tongue-distance.

 

At Kev's garage, Kev is busy fixing cars while Abi and Carl are setting up legover dates but they have to be careful because Ty and/or Kev might spot them together. You think Kev might be tipped off when Abi shows up at the garage looking super-glam instead of wearing greasy overalls.

 

George's first internet date falls flat when his mystery match turns out to be an old school friend of Glenda's. However Jenny seems interested in George although she won't admit it.

 

Over at their new house (Yasmeen's old house), Carla and Lisa (and Ryan and Betsy) are settling in and Carla has plans to propose to Lisa. Will Peter be invited to the wedding?

 

And now a few lines from the week that was:

 

Todd can't believe that Gary was sensitive about Theo's angry outburst:

"Gary Windass? The walking testosterone molecule?"

(he can be quite sensitive.. when he's not beating up people) 

Gary to Theo re: his plan to punish Noah:

"I know what I'm doing"

(No he doesn't) 

Gary (again) to Theo:

"I'm not a caveman"

(Yes he is)

 

Kev to Abi (who says she has a migraine):

"Go home. Get yourself tucked up in bed"

(with Carl) 

Brian opines on mortality:

"In the midst of life we are in death"

(sounds like he was at the 'Dog and Gun' recently) 

Fiz can't stand Steve and Cassie's persistent mouth-to-mouth non-resuscitation:

"Any more tonsil tennis from them..I swear"

(the phrase 'get a room' springs to mind... if only Steve could find one) 

Bernie to Dev after they tie the knot:

"Looks like the untameable has been tamed"

(Quick, call David Attenborough. This could be a new documentary)

Bernie vows that she and Dev will never be normal:

"What is normal? It's a just cycle in the washing machine"

(although 'delicate' might be a better option) 

 

Jenny to George:

"I've never had anyone fix my leaky o-ring before"

(it usually requires a medical professional) 

Jenny to Rita and Ryan re: George:

"I am not interested in Eileen Grimshaw's sloppy seconds"

(neither was Eileen, it seems)

 

***

Well, fellow Dev-otees (and Detractors), so ends another week. Looks like Aadi just can't catch a break. Poor fella seems destined to be shipped off to Mumbai. As for Theo, that eerie smile gives me the creeps - Todd should be careful.  Thanks so much for stopping by and spending time at the Hip. All the best and have a great week!

Coronation Street Catch Up: the under-cooked prawn curry edition

 your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

If Summer married into Bernie's family, would she be Summer Winter? 

(just asking)

 

As for the Dev-Bernie wedding, well let's just say it was unusual.

 

First there was the arrival of Auntie Rani, a severe lady who takes a dim view of Bernie and her friends. Then there's Bernie's plan to skim off money from Aunties' 25K wedding gift to help Aadi pay off debts he incurred while mismanaging Dev's shop. That plan seems to go awry when Auntie leaves suddenly before the wedding after Dev publicly admonishes her for calling Bernie "common".

 

The actual wedding went ahead... slowly.

 

Bernie was late because she caught Brody burgling Dev's house (apparently he was desperate to raise cash to run away to Spain with his sisters). No matter, Debbie managed to entertain the impatient guests with a stunning - extended play - vocal performance (Hopelessly Devoted to You). For an encore, she proposed to Ronnie (he accepted BTW) before Bernie showed up. One must say that Bernie's outfit was quite..um.. arresting and her blonde blob bun was effervescent. 

 

But, hold on, as the ceremony got underway Bernie had trouble breathing. Could it be a panic attack?

Elsewhere the fallout from Kevin's lies (pretending he still had cancer) continues. When Debbie finds out, she is livid and disowns him and then, later, re-owns him. Kevin wants Carl to leave the garage and go back to Germany but he still seems to be hanging around. 

 

For Abi, Kev's lies seem to be the green light for her to jump into bed with Carl. Carl tries to break off his relationship with Abi lest Kevin shop him to the police. Carl reveals Kev's blackmail scheme to Abi and another legover ensues. Carl then confesses all his misdeeds (debts, fake MOTs. car theft) to Abi who walks out on him but returns to his hotel room. Despite her misgivings, I think you can guess what happens next (it starts with "leg" and ends with "over").

 

Over at Eileen's house, Todd seems to have one bad idea after another. Certainly busting in on Theo's family get-together to tell everyone that Danielle's snog-partner is Noah was not a brilliant idea. Then there was the summit meeting with Billy and Danielle that also went awry.  

 

The result?

Todd's sleeping on the couch (and it's his house!)

 

Poor James is no longer taking care of Laila as Dee Dee (as Laila's Mum) wants to be Laila's parent. James is ready to leave Coronation Street but Dee Dee tries to convince him to stay and help her raise Laila.

 

Lisa seems to be having a breakthrough in her therapy sessions as she struggles to decide whether her late wife (Becky) was corrupt. Nice to see that the therapy is finally helping but why does the therapist call someone and tell them about Lisa's breakthrough? And what is Kit's involvement in all this?

 

Meanwhile, Carla is trying to help Lisa and decides that one way is by visiting Logan Radcliffe in jail as apparently he and his brother may (or may not) know something about Becky's alleged corruption. One small snag. Logan wants 10K before he'll disclose any info but he gives Carla a tidbit of info for free.

Tim and Sally are worried about bruises on the arm of Shanice. Sally wants to call social services but Brody doesn't want social services involved because they might break up the family. Brody also attends a footie match with Kit as the two get to know each other.

And now for a few lines from the week that was:

 

Bernie to Nick as Dev does some pole dancing during his stag night:

"You'd be amazed at our bedroom athletics"

(try getting that image out of your head)

Mary recounts her India anecdote to the hen-do guests:

"I often wonder how my life would have turned out if I hadn't eaten that under-cooked prawn curry"

(fewer visits to the hospital ER?) 

Shona to Auntie Rani and hen-do guests:

"This hen-do is the worst thing ever"

(and she's married to David) 

Auntie Rani to Dev re: Bernie

"She is a common loudmouth"

(hold on! She's not common) 

Debbie is escorted by Ronnie and Roy:

"Shall I be luncheon meat between a Royston and Ronnie sandwich"

(please! I just had breakfast) 

Theo to Todd: 

"Either you sleep downstairs on the sofa or you'll never see me again"

(but it's Todd's house) 

 

Kev to Carl: 

"Go back to Germany"

(or you'll miss Oktoberfest) 

Logan Radcliffe is surprised to see Carla visit him in jail

"I've always been dead popular with lesbians"

(and the police) 

 

Theo's description of Rev Billy.

"Patron saint of sticking his beak in"

(Saint Nosy of Assisi?) 

Carl confesses his dodgy MOT activities to Abi:

"I've been doing it from Kev's garage"

(are we still talking about MOTs?)

 

***

Well, fellow pole dancing partisans, so ends another week. Sorry to see Auntie Rani leave so soon. Not sure what the end game is for Abi, Carl and Kev but it doesn't look good for Kev, the garage, Carl, Abi or the Federal Republic of Germany. Thanks so much for stopping by. Have a great week!

Coronation Street Catch Up: the Dr. Lager to the rescue edition

your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

Well, Abi and Carl didn't waste much time, did they?

 

As soon as Abi discovered that Kev was lying about his cancer and the need for more chemo, she had the green light to have it off with Carl. It was every bit as romantic as a legover can be... in a garage (I hope they didn't get motor oil on their unmentionables).

 

It was Ty who finally spilled the beans to Abi and the fact that Kev no longer had cancer. Abi was naturally incensed and decided to leave Kevin but may have changed her mind because Jack was upset. Meanwhile Carl's ardour has cooled somewhat because Kev is threatening to shop him to the coppers for all his illegal activities at the garage (theft, fake MOTs etc.).

 

Elsewhere Todd keeps getting into scrapes. 

 

First he gate crashes a conversion therapy session and gets into a scuffle with conversion therapy specialist Noah. One of the punters takes a video of the episode and, as a result, Todd is reported to the coppers who force Todd to participate in a restorative justice session with Noah.

 

Then, while Theo is having a family reconciliation session at the Bistro, Todd bursts in and announces to the family that Danielle (Theo's wife) and Noah are having it off. This results in Theo's son (Miles) taking a swipe at Todd and, as he intervenes, Theo (unfortunately) punches Miles.

Over at Ed's house, Dee Dee has decided that she wants to keep her baby. James is upset at this turn of events as he was expecting to adopt Laila. As Dee Dee juggles motherhood and her legal work, James takes the opportunity to look after Laila. But then Dee Dee discovers that he was seen leaving the house with packed bags and the baby. Surely he doesn't intend to kidnap Laila?

 

Dev has returned from India and is stumbling into a lot of secrets at home. First he didn't know about Adi's wild party (until Lauren told him). And he still doesn't know that Adi faked a robbery to collect insurance money to pay off debts that he racked up while mismanaging the shop. 

 

Adi learns that the insurance company won't pay out to cover the fake losses. So Bernie (who is in on the deception), has a plan to siphon off some of the money that Dev's aunt has promised as a wedding gift for the upcoming nuptials of Dev and Bernie.

 

Audrey's birthday party goes well except that Leanne finds Sam hiding under the desk in the Bistro office. Sam has been traumatized (by Lily's actions during Mick's school rampage). David's efforts to talk to Sam fall flat. Sam then engineers a revenge gambit against Lily (scaring her into thinking her house has been burgled). The truth is that Sam is having anxiety attacks and needs help. Toyah finally recognizes the extent of his trauma.

 

And now for a few lines from the week that was:

 

Carl to Abi after their inaugural legover:

"Wow"

(care to expand?) 

Abi to Carl after their inaugural legover:

"That was cracking"

(and it was in a garage) 

Nick to Sam:

"Don't take advice from your Uncle David"

(Good advice) 

Bernie doesn't want Dev's expensive wedding limo:

"You could stick me in a wheelbarrow"

(it might come to that) 

Abi to Carl:

"You basically lied to get your leg over"

(what's your point?) 

James (to Ed) as he tries to drown his sorrows:

"Dr Lager to the rescue"

(maybe switch to Dr. Non-alcoholic lager) 

 

Jack to Abi re: Kevin:

"You're his rock"

(yes, from the Paleozoic era) 

Millie to her brother re: Theo:

"He's gay now"

(keep me posted if there are any changes) 

Bernie to Dev re: supper:

"I can do one of my veggie bakes"

(hmm. Let me get back to you) 

Bernie to Dev:

"I want to be married to Weatherfield's most handsome man"

(I'll start looking) 

Kev to Carl:

"You're dead to me"

(Quick, call George) 

 

Kev to Abi re: Carl:

"The way you look at Carl; younger, fitter"

(dodgier) 

 

***

Well, fellow Carl Critics, so ends another week. The truth finally comes out about Kev's cancer remission. Abi and Carl finally have their legover.  Dee Dee finally realizes that she wants her baby. What's next?

Thanks so much for spending time here at the Hip and have a great week. 

Coronation Street Catch Up: the friendly smacker edition

 your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

You must remember this.

A kiss is just a kiss. 

Unless from Debbie, it's inspired.

The fundamental things in life when Ryan's fired...

 

Yes, Debbie continues to struggle with her diagnosis of dementia and lashes out at anyone who is trying to support her, including poor Ryan on whom she plants one right on the kisser. When Ryan mentions this to Ronnie and Debbie (who has forgotten the incident), Debbie reacts badly and fires Ryan.

 

Meanwhile Deb's brother, Carl, is being hounded by a loan shark and asks Deb for some cash. Deb is happy to oblige until she learns that Carl wants a cool 50K! No dice. Debs doesn't have that kind of cash to throw around. Abi is increasingly worried about Carl.

 

Some good news and bad news. 

 

Dev is back from India and is happy to see everyone. That's the good news. The bad news? Dev doesn't know that Adi arranged for a fake robbery (thanks Brody!) so he can claim insurance money to pay for the losses he incurred while Dev was away. It seems like a goofy plan which is destined to fail. Bernie knows about the scheme but decides to stay quiet.

 

Dev is not that keen on Adi's budding romance with Lauren and manages to anger Adi with his disdain for Lauren. Lauren still doesn't know that she drank Adi's spiked drink at Adi's ill-fated party.

 

Happy Birthday to Audrey!

 

Seems that Aud is celebrating her 85th with a celebration at the Bistro (where else?) Alas, poor Sam leaves the celebration and is obviously traumatized following Lily's bizarre actions, i.e. locking the classroom door in Sam's face when Mick was rampaging through the school.

 

Speaking of Mick et famille. Mick and Lu's kids are in the care of Tim and Sally. Sally takes Shanice and Janie to visit Lu in jail. Lu takes the opportunity to have a quiet word with Sal and asks her to cough up the dosh to hire an expensive lawyer to help her case. 

 

Meanwhile all is not rosy with Todd and Theo. Theo gets ambushed by professional conversion therapy vicar, Noah. Noah convinces Theo to try conversion therapy again. Todd subsequently gatecrashes a conversion session and gets into a rumble with Noah. Natch', someone caught the whole thing on a cellphone camera. A video on social media is sure to follow.

 

Michael is shocked to discover that Carla wants to meet with Logan (one of the dastardly Radcliffe brothers) to find out what he knows about Lisa's late ex-wife (Becky) and the mystery surrounding her death and possible corruption.

 

And now for a few lines from the week that was: 

 

Kit to Sarah who brings him some candy:

"I just don't like nuts in chocolate"

(next time, just bring him a Curly Wurly)

 

Debbie disputes Ryan's version of her lip lock: 

"That wasn't a kiss, that was a friendly smacker"

(tongueless, of course) 

 

Debbie again to Ryan:

"Keep your sticky beak out of my business"

(it's not sticky) 

 

Noah (conversion therapy guy) to Theo:

"You know what you're doing is a Cardinal sin"

(putting up scaffolding?) 

Audrey to Sarah:

"There's always a downside to irresistible men" 

(Yes, Alfie was fighting women off with a stick) 

Dev tells Aadi he needs his special good luck charm for a golf game:

"Have you seen my lucky boxers?" 

(Muhammad Ali and Joe Frazer?) 

***

Well, fellow Weatherfield wanderers, so ends another week. Thanks so much for stopping by and have a great week. 

Coronation Street Catch Up: the ice wife edition

 your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

Looks like the Coronation Street Wing of Weatherfield General Hospital is filling up once again as Gary and Kit are occupying beds (although Lauren has been discharged so that frees up a room just in case any other Corrie residents are assaulted, stabbed, drugged etc).

 

But back to Gary. 

 

We finally discover that Gary (who was MIA for a while) is recovering from nasty injuries at the Weatherfield Hospital. A mystery visitor appears constantly at his bedside. The nurses call her 'Gemma" and believe that Gary's name is 'Chesney'. 

 

What gives? 

 

Seems it's all a ruse concocted by Lu. Lu tried to blackmail Gary for cash (which she desperately needs). Gary refused and so Lu slugged him and, after Gary was taken to hospital, Lu somehow convinced the nurses that the patient's name was Chesney and that she (Lu) was named Gemma (what? no medicare card verification?)

 

It's a big mystery until Maria figures out that Lu is hiding the truth and the whole charade unravels quickly. Now Lu is behind bars and Maria is in a snit because Gary lied to her about Lu's attempt at seduction and blackmail. 

 

And what of Lu's better (not so much) half?

 

Mick is in jail (after killing poor Craigie) but engineers his exit from incarceration via the prison laundry (motto: we offer one hour Martinizing and escape). 

 

Mick's half-baked plan is to gather together his family and, I guess, scarper to greener pastures. Brody (former son of Mick and now biological son of Kit) is tasked with gathering together the family but Sally is with Joanie and the two hide on the roof of Underworld as Mick frantically searches for them.

 

Kit tracks down Mick at Underworld but, during a struggle on the catwalk, Mick stabs Kit. It ends with a standoff between Mick and Sally on the roof of the factory. Sally bravely convinces Mick to back down.  Kit is taken to hospital and seems to be recovering until he takes a turn for the worse and is rushed into the operating room.

 

Phew!

 

Elsewhere, Kev has decided that it's a good idea to lie about his cancer and tells everyone that the chemo didn't work. This is a ploy to try to ensure that Abi doesn't leave him.  Tyrone soon rumbles Kev's deception and insists that Kevin tell Abi the truth, but Kev declines as Abi has booked a romantic getaway and Kev doesn't wanted to spoil things by revealing his deception.

 

Over at Ed's place, James is still angry with Dee Dee for her secret christening of Laila. Meanwhile Dee Dee meets a charming (ish) stranger in the Rovers and they seem to get on quite nicely.

 

And, finally, it looks like Daniel may be once again working at Weatherfield High School as he has an interview for a teaching job (briefly interrupted by Mick rampaging through the school). Oh, and why did Lily lock Sam out of a classroom while Mick was terrorizing the school kids? Nick wants to know.

 

And now for a (very) few lines from a rather dark and humourless week that was:  

 

Kevin's sister thinks that her health problems should be secondary to Kev's health:

"Debbie does dementia can wait"

(maybe cut down on the white wine though)  

Gary to Maria re: the hospital staff:

"They think I'm Chesney"

(Maybe that's why they asked you for free kebabs?) 

Mick discovers Tim's contact name for Sally:

"Ice wife"

(Tim insists ICE stands for 'In Case of Emergency') 

 

***

Well, fellow cobble comrades, so ends another week. It seems that the past week was more like 'Scott and Bailey' and less like Coronation Street. I wonder if Mick and Lou's kids will become regular cast members now that both parents are in jail. Hmm. Thanks so much for spending your quality time here at the Hip. Have a great week and all the best!