your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...
Canada's off-beat, light-hearted Coronation Street blog inspired by the incomparable Blanche Hunt
your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...
your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...
For a man of the cloth, Rev. Billy sure has a mean right hook.
The angry archdeacon displayed his boxing skills in the Bistro when one of Paul's old pals disrespected Paul and made light of his illness. This ruined Billy's Valentine Day surprise (a serenade from a barbershop quartet) and Billbo lost his cool and assaulted the rude lout.
This was the culmination of a rather stressful day for Billy who is suffering from severe back pain as he tries to take care of Paul. The fallout? Billy gets charged with assault and is taken to the police station but fortunately Dee Dee manages to liberate the Reverend.
On top of that, Billy has secretly advised Summer not to accept an offer from a U.S. university to study abroad (due to Paul's illness). When Paul learns that Billy has been hiding the truth about Summer's opportunity and Billy's hardship, he is not pleased. Billy now fears that Paul may want to break up with him.
***
Well, fellow Weatherfield watchers, so ends another week. I hope poor Liam gets some support or finds a way out of his bullying hell at the hands of Mason and false friend, Dylan. Maybe George can help?
Speaking of help, Billy could sure use Moses' help right now as he struggles to care for Paul. Let's hope things get better soon. Thanks for the pleasure of your company and have a great week!
your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...
Well, I think we can say that Tommy Orpington's 'body of work' speaks for itself and that Tracy was 'stimulated' by his efforts in the bedroom. But what of poor Steve? Away for a mini-break in France while Tracy and Tommy engage in "le grand legover". Mon Dieu!
Steve returns, none the wiser, and tries to be a better, more affectionate husband (sorry Stevie, Tommy beat you to it). Now Steve is wondering why Tracy is not succumbing to his noble efforts while Tommy takes on the herculean task of making over Sally's bedroom as super-fan Tim enjoys the proximity to his idol.
Adam is getting himself deeper into trouble after making a deal with Harvey in order to exact revenge on Harvey's step brother, Damon. Damon, as we know, is shacking up with Sarah (excellent picker of men) and Adam is determined to get rid of his nemesis. To do this, Adam must get a hapless cancer victim (Harvey's associate) to insist that it was he (and not Harvey) who shot Natasha. This con job is designed to get Harvey's early release from jail.
Vixen-in-training, Bethany, tricks Lauren into dishing the dirt on Ryan and Daisy with a view to writing a piece of trash for a trashy online publication called 'Chit Chat'. There's no chance that she will win a Pulitzer for this gem of investigative journalism. Daniel, of course, is clueless about what Bethany is up to.
Nice guy Joel seems to have some skeletons in his closet as a mystery woman shows up suddenly to harangue Joel and causes him to insist that he'll "get it sorted". Dee Dee remains blissfully unaware of Joel's past as she becomes ever more smitten by her boyfriend.
Simon goes from bad to worse as he continues to wallow in self pity and alcoholic beverages. Leanne is worried that he may be taking after his Dad.
And now for a whole bunch of lines from the week that was:
your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...
I must say Tracy and Tommy Orpington seem to be getting on like a yard house on fire.
How did one of Weatherfield County's star footballers wind up painting houses? You might well ask.
Seems that Tommy's post-football (soccer) career has left him cash poor. A bad investment in a burger restaurant and a costly divorce have left the Beckhamesque legend with no choice but to take on decorating jobs.
Steve was supposed to do some redecorating for Tracy but he is (according to Tracy) a WOS (Waste of Space) and heading off to Paris to see Emma. Tracy thus hired the fit footballer to take on the job.
Steve is mega-disappointed since he idolizes Tommy O. and Tommy's trio of gormless admirers/stalkers (Tim, Kev & Kirk) are eager to be pals with the legend. However, Tracy manages to keep the fans at bay while, at the same time, getting along famously with Tommy. Could they be developing a a 'pitch' perfect relationship? Is Steve getting a red card? Let's ask VAR...
Speaking of getting on like a house on fire, the builders yard caught fire while Ed was camped out there. This after bailiffs came to his house looking for debt repayment. Michael was outraged (again) and although Ed managed to satisfy the bailiffs by giving them his tools and equipment, he had nowhere to go except the yard. The heater in the year caught fire and the yard was engulfed in flames. Michael thought that Ed was in the yard office and charged in to rescue him. However Ed wasn't in the yard at the time but nearby, heard his son's cries for help, and managed to rescue Michael who was taken to the Coronation Street Wing of Weatherfield General Hospital to recover.
Their reconciliation was short-lived when the coppers began investigating the cause of the fire. Michael became convinced that Ed set the fire deliberately to claim insurance money.
Seems that Ed did know the yard was on fire but decided to get some chips - rather than do anything about it. When Dee Dee finds out, she is disgusted. Also, Aggie is finally informed (by phone) about what's going on and wants nothing more to do with Ed.
Meanwhile, Bernie decides to take Paul and Gemma on an overnight trip in a battered RV. Things don't go well as the Winnebago gets stuck in a field and the threesome spend an uncomfortable night - not just because of the RV but also because Bernie and Gemma find out about Paul's assisted dying plan.
Once the trio returns (with the assistance of a rugby team that pushes the RV out of the mud and then falls flat on their collective face), another problem arises. Bernie complains about Paul's carer (Moses) and Moses is then suspended. Nice one, Bernie! Now Paul faces the loss of Moses who says he's planning to move to London.
Bethany seems to spend all her time parked at the cafe or the Rovers, taking up space while trying to pitch a story to her editor. Daniel tells Bethany that she's welcome to move into his flat. Daisy remains cheesed off with Bethany and Daniel.
Simon is similarly cheesed off and manages to get fired from Underworld. He is temporarily elated at the prospect of joining his Dad on board the SS Minnow (somewhere on the ocean) but the offer is rescinded and Simon resumes his alcohol-based, surly disposition.
And now for some lines from the week that was:
Tracy to Steve re: how to treat the great Tommy Orpington:
"Do you want me to wash his brushes and all?"
(are we talking about painting?)
Dee Dee to Ed re: the police investigation of the fire:
"That Craig Tinker is a clown"
(he does have rather big shoes)
Billy explains his back injury to Paul:
"I was doing the bump"
(don't tell the archbishop... unless he's into disco)
Paul to Billy in the hospital:
"We'll have our own wing in here soon"
(The Coronation Street Wing)
Tracy to Steve re: Tommy Orpington taking over Steve's painting job:
"He's replacing you"
(not really that hard to do)
your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...
Good news!
After her gift of a mega-fridge went so well, Glam Grandma Linda bought a grand piano and a pool table (she didn't bother measuring, just eye-balled it). Too big for such a small house, you say? No worries. Kirkie is around to help with the installation (after tea and bickies).
I kid, of course (except for the mega fridge). Linda has not bought any more gargantuan-sized furnishings for Ches and Gemma. Linda also says she is truly sorry for saying that the kids should be taken away from Gemma. Gemma is angry with Linda (and Chesney) for plotting against her. She is especially pissed off at Chesney for doubting her legitimate concerns about Joseph's nagging symptoms.
Joseph is also well cheesed at Chesney for not listening to him when he said he was sick. As it happens, Joseph and Gemma were right. Turns out that Joseph has Lyme Disease and is now being treated in hospital. However the damage is done and Ches and Gemma's marriage seems to be on rocky ground.
I must say, Harvey is really easy to reach by phone in jail (certainly much easier than Rogers customer service). That's handy for Adam who has now entered into an agreement with Harvey. In return for a speedy appeal of Harvey's long jail sentence, Harvey has agreed to instruct one of his colleagues to get rid of Damon. For these services, Adam must pay (cash only, no debit) a rough-hewn colleague of Harvey's (old pals, no doubt, from their Oxford days).
Meanwhile, Bernie has been released from prison and is happy to be back and hanging out with her son, Paul, and cleaning his flat (all good as long as she doesn't find that chemical suicide concoction that Paul has hidden). Leave it to Todd to break off his dinner with Moses, come to the flat and hide the deadly drug.
Over at Gary and Maria's, poor Liam is still dealing with certified meathead and professional bully Mason. Dylan isn't making things any easier by going along with Mason's campaign of intimidation against his supposed friend, Liam.
After some words from Gary about standing up to bullies, Liam makes an ill-advised stand against Mason in order to recover his phone and winds up lunging at Dylan (who called him a loser). The mini fight is stopped by the school head (Mrs. Crawshaw) and Liam is suspended. Sean is outraged and thinks that Dylan has suffered at the hands of Liam.
Max (for reasons I can't fathom) confronts Lauren about her mysterious boyfriend. Lauren is not amused. Lauren and Sabrina subsequently have casual drinks with Bobby and Simon but leave when Simon (definitely charm challenged and quite surly) says they are fond of racists (like Max).
And now a few lines from the week that was:
Dev to Todd:
"How's things in the dead body business?"
(good conversation starter!)
your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...
Tip for Cassie: You should never leave cash in the fridge... in case your money is frozen.
But I digress (already?) Here's the thing. Cassie and Evelyn staked out the house of puppy felon Terry. While Evelyn tried to video Terry in front of his house, Cassie sneaked in and stumbled upon Terry's puppy mill. As she tried to rescue the pups, Terry walked in and Cassie slugged him. Then she scarpered with a bunch of cash which she saw lying around.
Terry was taken to hospital but recovered and was charged by police. The puppies were rescued by an animal charity. Evelyn avoided being thrown in jail as there was no evidence to show that she clobbered Terry.
As for the cash, Cassie stashed it in freezer of the wobbly fridge in Ty's house (someone should do something about that). However, seems that the all-seeing, all snooping Hope spies Cassie withdrawing some of her.. um.. 'cold', hard cash and wants a cut in order to stay quiet.
Finally Evelyn learns the truth about Cassie, her run-in with Terry and the cash she took. Cassie tries to make amends by giving the money to a charity.
Evelyn decides to move back to Chez Dobbs and give Ty a chance to take a holiday with Fiz in Italy. Bene!
Since Evelyn is moving out of Roy's, Nina can comfortably move back in as she has broken up with Asha after confessing to a minor smooch with Aadi. An overly-aggrieved Asha pops into Aadi's flat and finds him passed out on the sofa. She leaves. It is left to Amy to get into the flat and she discovers that Aadi is suffering from Carbon Monoxide poisoning. Fortunately there is a spare bed for him at the Coronation Street Wing of Weatherfield General Hospital and he makes a speedy recovery.
As for Damon. Well there's good news and bad news.
The good news is that Sarah now wants to be with him and they have a celebratory leg over.
The bad news is that Damon's car is now a compact.
The car crushing is the work of half-brother Harvey who is out to get Damon and mentions Sarah and Harry in a threatening manner.
And there's more bad news as Adam wants to get rid of Damon and makes a deal with Harvey to make that happen. Harvey, in return, wants Adam in his back pocket for "future considerations" (as they say in hockey).
But perhaps the worst news is that Sarah (for reasons one cannot fathom) decides that this is a great time for her to introduce the big D to the Platt family. I mean, I know Damon's a lowlife and a bad dude but this is cruel and unusual punishment - even for him.
Meanwhile, over at Chesney's house, Glam Gran Linda shows up and wants to know why Gemma isn't living in the house (as we know, she's not allowed while social services conducts an investigation). Linda offers to support Ches if he decides to pursue sole custody of the quads plus Joseph. Yikes!
Oh, and Joseph is still not well and the only one who knows it is Gemma.
And now for some lines from the week that was:
Cassie tells Evelyn that she freed the puppies at Terry's house:
"Who let the dogs out?"
(I believe was you)
Damon taunts Harvey:
"You've got the name of a show jumper"
(oh, oh, you've 'spurred' him into action)
Nick to Gail re: Damon:
"They're all saying he tried to kidnap Adam"
(and they're right)
David re: Sarah's announcement that she and Damon are a couple:
"A couple of what?"
(don't ask)
Gail to Audrey re: Sarah:
"She's got such a terrible taste in men"
(Is there a pot calling a kettle black nearby?)
Roy explains to Nina an exciting development about bats:
"They are more closely related to humans than rodents"
(whereas Harvey is more closely related to rodents than humans)
Evelyn to Roy re: Terry the puppy mill villain:
"He's like a ferret on adrenaline"
(a very bad ferret)
***
Well, Super(bowl) Street fans, so ends another week. Damon is back and trouble seems to follow him like a shadow. Harvey is up to no good. Adam is also up to no good as he makes a deal with Harvey which he is surely bound to regret in the fullness of time. Thanks, as always, for the pleasure of your company here at the Hip and I hope you have a great week.
your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...
Ah, Damon. Is he a reformed criminal who just wants a second chance or a secret sleazeball with a hidden agenda?
Well, let's see. He did kidnap Adam, and almost shot the Scottish lawyer in the head. On the other hand, he also turned down his incarcerated half-brother (Harvey) who wanted his half-bro to assist in a planned robbery. So one never knows.
Meanwhile Damon gives Ed a wad of cash for construction work on his new business venture. Ed is tempted to gamble but resists and Damon is quite supportive.
Sarah seems to be wavering about her feelings for the big D. On the one hand, she tells Damon to sling his hook. On the other hand, she has admitted that she is attracted to the hunky hoodlum. As for Adam, he is outraged by Damon's actions and lets the coppers - as well as Sarah - know. Sadly, no-one seems particularly concerned and Adam is left fuming and determined to get rid of Damon once and for all.
While we ponder Damon's true intentions, more pressing issues are arising Chez Rev. Billy and Paul.
After an excruciating and embarrassing bathroom disaster, Paul starts to foresee his dismal future with Motor Neuron Disease and tries to enlist Todd's help to plan for assisted dying. Todd refuses. Paul then asks Abi to get him some drugs he could use to kill himself at a time of his choosing.
Abi obliges but is caught out by Cassie who tattletales to Kev about Abi meeting her drug dealer. Kev goes off on one so Abi is forced to admit that she acquired the drugs for Paul. Kev then storms into Billy's flat and gives Paul a right rollicking and Billy thus learns of the suicide plan.
After an emotional exchange, Billy finally agrees to assist Paul in his last wishes if and when Paul asks for Billy's help.
Elsewhere, Evelyn plays detective and spies Terry buying large quantities of dog food. She concludes that he is operating a puppy mill and is determined to do something about it. Roy is not keen.
Roy is also not keen on Cassie's behaviour. He feels compelled to tell Abi that it was Cassie that probably scratched the toff's expensive car (not Abi) and Roy is equally annoyed at Cassie's tattletales about Abi being back on drugs.
Dev is keen on a birthday dinner for Aadi and Asha. The twins are not so keen.
And now for a few lines from the week that was: