Coronation Street Catch Up: the 'resting miserable' edition

your irreverent update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

It's certainly very disturbing that Alfie got sick due to the awful conditions in Abi's flat (even though you could probably have spotted the mold from the International Space Station).

 

Nevertheless, Alfie has a serious health concern and is rushed to hospital with breathing problems. Meanwhile Abi is furious with the flat's new owner, Idris. Idris claims that he only discovered the hazardous condition of the flat after he bought the property from a scumbag landlord. Idris' solution is to enlist Brody to help him rough up the previous owner. 

 

Sally is not keen on Brody's job as an enforcer for Idris.

 

Elsewhere, the verdict is in and Megan has been found guilty.  

 

Will is relieved (as is his family) but Megan is none too pleased and lashes out at everyone before being removed from the courtroom. Sam is also relieved to learn that Megan has been found guilty and is even inclined to forgive Nick for lying to him about the court proceedings.

 

Meanwhile Steve and Cassie are having relationship issues as Cassie proposes to Steve and Steve declines to enter into holy matrimony for a record 8th time (someone call the Guinness Book of Records). Cassie is not only knocked back, but also taunted by Tracy who receives a slap from Cassie in the Rovers (think of it as added value for the price of a hotpot).

 

George certainly has his hands full these days. 

 

First he tries to reconcile with Summer for basically putting her in the frame as Theo's killer with a very circumstantial statement to police. Summer accepts his apology. George then has to face the fact that Christina has a spending problem (not an 'I-bought-two-packets-of-Hob-Nobs-instead-of-one' type of problem, but rather a multiple credit card bills type of problem). 

 

Glenda discovers the evidence and George finally confronts Christina and accompanies her to a credit card anonymous meeting (VISA cardholders on Mondays, Mastercard cardholders on Tuesdays and Thursdays). It looks like George is convinced that Christina has a serious problem and offers his support.

 

Ruby and Hope are up to their usual meddling and decide that it would be a great idea to track down Tyrone's biological father and plan a surprise reunion (thanks ancestry.com!). One small snag is that Ty's Dad only got together with Cassie for a one-night legover when she was an addict and having sex to support her habit. So... not the greatest of family reunion stories.  

 

Anyhoo, Ty isn't really interested in reuniting with dear old Dad. However Dad is keen on reconnecting with Tyrone and threatens to tell Ty the real story of his liaison with Cassie... unless Cassie facilitates a happy father and son relationship.

 

And now for a few lines from the week that was:

 

Cassie proposes to Steve:  

"I could be the Kate to your William"

(more like the Meghan to your Harry)

Tracy to Cassie after overhearing her proposal to Steve on the Streetcars radio:

"You should try the proposal from 'Pretty Woman' because she was a bit of a slapper in all"

(ouch!) 

Tracy to Steve:

"Steve, Steve, Steve, the most married man in Weatherfield"

(I'm surprised Gianni Infantino hasn't given him a FIFA prize)

 

Tracy to Ken: 

"Is everything always my fault?"

(actually, yes) 

Tracy to Steve:

"You get wed like other men buy pants"

(they never fit right) 

Christina explains her frequent bathroom trips to Glenda and George:

"My undercarriage is like Niagara Falls"

(American side or Canadian side?) 

George apologizes to Summer:

"I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you"

(How? With free funerals?)

Abi to Idris:

"You're my scumbag landlord!"

(please, no formalities. Just call me 'Scum')

Maggie describes Lauren's usual expression:

"Resting miserable"

(...and that's when she's in a good mood) 

***

Well, fellow Rovers regulars, so ends another week. Here's hoping that poor Alfie makes a full recovery. It looks like Abi will be moving back in with Kevin. Will it remain strictly platonic or will they become a couple again? I guess we'll find out. Thanks as always for stopping by and do have a great week.

Coronation Street Catch Up: the prisoner to the collagen edition

 Your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

Well, it looks like Will gets a do-over in court.

His first appearance at the trial of Megan did not go the way his family expected. Rather than condemn the evil groomer, Will told the jury exactly what Megan pressured him to say and insisted that Megan did nothing wrong.

But after a quick chat with Tim, the sage of Streetcars, Will realizes that he has made a mistake and now wants to tell the truth.

The judge allows Will to take the stand for a second time and this time Will puts Megan squarely in the frame, much to the chagrin of Megan and her lawyer (Adam).

Now the question is what will the jury's verdict be?

Elsewhere, Sarah is starting to lose it.

She has finally figured out that it was the resident nutbar Jodie who conked her on the head. However, Jodie has also figured out that Sarah was involved in Theo's murder. So it's a stalemate. David knows that something's up with Sarah and tips off Kit who tries unsuccessfully to talk to her.

Speaking of stalemates, poor Sam is still in hospital and anxious to get updates on Megan's trial. Since the trial is not going well, Nick decides to lie about it. 

Bad idea.

Of course Sam learns the truth and resents Nick and everyone else. And didn't Leanne promise to visit? Yes, but that was before her marathon leg over festival with smarmy Idris.

Now Sam's recovery has hit a setback and he's not happy about it.

Over at the Bistro, Summer is splashing the cash and treating her friends to drinks, meals and gifts. But she soon figures out that it's a mugs game.

And now for a very few lines from the week that was:

Christina to Todd re: her facial mask:

"I'm a prisoner to the collagen"

(Please release her)

Megan to Will:

"I can't go to prison"

(I don't see why not)

Summer to her friends:

"From now on I'm going to be a pigeon"

(I guess she'll wing it)

***

Well faithful followers, so ends another week. Sorry for the delay in posting. I've encountered some technical delays this week. Thanks for your patience. Have a great week!

Coronation Street Catch Up: the town bike edition

your irreverent update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

The only way Kit's dinner party could have been worse is if Jamie Oliver had barged in and insisted on making a fantastic green salad with cyclospora lettuce.

 

As it was, Maria did enough damage on her own as she accused Sarah and Gary of having it off and then attacked Gary for lying about it. The fact that Summer was half corked didn't help. Plus, Sarah was on edge and picking up broken glass with her bare hands (ever hear of a pan and broom?) 

 

Of course, this entire gourmet dining charade was Kit's half-baked plan to expose Gary as Theo's killer.

 

Wrongo.

 

We now know (via flashbacks) that Sarah was the killer. She was the last person in Theo's flat and wound up face-to-face with the abusive bully on the scaffolding outside the flat. As Theo made cruel comments about Sarah's stillborn son (Billy), Sarah defended herself by pushing Theo and then whacking him with a conveniently placed iron bar. Theo fell to the ground.

 

After realizing that Theo was dead, Sarah phoned Gary who came over and helped Sarah cover up the deadly deed. After that, the two struggled to stay quiet as Swain and Kit fumbled to identify the killer. Now the truth must surely come out, especially after Sarah confesses to Todd.

 

It's only a matter of time before Kit finds out and that's going to put a crimp in his plans to propose to Sarah (unless he's keen on a prison wedding).

 

Elsewhere, Ronnie still has a big headache thanks to Carl who fumbled a simple gun delivery for Fiona. Now Fiona is adamant that she wants her weapon and Ronnie is (if you'll excuse the expression) under the gun. 

 

Of course, we know that it was Crazy Jodie who got hold of the gun. 

 

Speaking of Jodie. the nutjob decides to make David jealous by going on a date with Ryan. The date is almost (but not quite) as excruciating as Kit's dinner party (Dunch, anyone?). To his credit, Ryan quickly susses the negative chemistry with Jodie and cuts her loose. Ryan deserves better, much better.

 

Over at the hospital, Sam is recovering but he is not happy with the effects of the medication which he blames for his diminishing chess-playing ability and other changes to his brain. Nick can only resort to his patented furrowed brow and constipated facial expression.

 

Over at Dev's, Asha and Nina decide to rent the old Theo and Todd 'flat of horror' (how soon they forget). Dev is not happy but Roy, as always, exudes class and generosity and even presents Nina with a train-based housewarming gift.

 

And now for a few lines from the week that was:  

 

Sarah tells Gary to keep quiet about Theo's murder: 

"You've got to keep your head down and your gob shut"

(and don't get those two things mixed up)

 

Sarah to Kit:

"Can we just have one night when we don't talk about murder?"

(how about next Tuesday?)

 

Maria to Kit:

"One Sarah plus one Gary equals two cheats"

(I didn't know Maria was a math whiz)

Sarah finally confesses to Todd:

"It was me. I knocked Theo off the scaffolding"

(oops) 

Maria informs the dinner party of her suspicions about Gary and Sarah:

"They've been at it for weeks"

(at what? can you be more specific?) 

Maria to the dinner party guests:

"It's like riding a bike, the town bike"

(you mean like a legover cycle?) 

Maria storms out of the dinner party as Gary remains silent:

"So you're a coward then as well as a rat"

(dessert anyone?) 

 

***

Well, fellow Sarah Skeptics, so ends another week and the cat is finally out of the bag. So many questions. When will Kit discover the truth? And what will he do? Will he try to cover up the truth, or will he dispatch Sarah to prison to keep Lou company? Time will tell. Thanks, as always, for the pleasure of your company and have a great week. 

Coronation Street Catch Up: the gob on legs edition

 your irreverent update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

They could be the next Marvel superheroes...

 

Call them the Bathrobe Babes or Debbie's Angels, five ferocious ladies of a certain age who fight crime in fluffy terry cotton spa attire. 

 

Their names? Sally, Christina, Debbie, Glenda and Bernie. 

Their mission? To protect Brody from three young yobbos who chase him into the basement of the Chariot Square Hotel, where the fearless five are ready to kick ass - but fortunately their pretend knowledge of martial arts is enough to scare the bullies away.

The basement paradise was the brainchild of Debbie's friends who wanted to give Debs a surprise getaway - without the stress and worry of a trip to Spain. Thanks to some planning and redecorating, the gals surprised Debbie with a tropical vacation right in her hotel. The ever-lovable Ryan was on hand (in various attires including a kilt) to provide the ladies with beverages, snacks and music.

 

So much for the good news.

Now for the bad news.

 

Carl has turned over a new leaf (or so he says), but he's taken one last job from Fiona which involves picking up a gun and then placing the gun in a secret hiding place. Sounds pretty straightforward.

 

In the meantime, Ronnie decides to snag Ty, Kev and Carl and keep them locked in the garage until they agree to a truce - for Debbie's sake. But the tense confrontation leads to Carl producing the stolen firearm. Call it gun fight at the Not-OK-Corral.

 

Fortunately, no-one gets hurt and a fragile cease fire is agreed to by all parties.

 

But things soon go awry. Carl places the gun in the specified hiding place for Fiona's goon to retrieve. Resident psycho Jodie happens to see Carl hiding the gun and snags it for herself. Meanwhile Fiona is livid and warns Carl of trouble if he doesn't find the gun. Debbie is livid too when she discovers Carl's exploit.

 

Thanks in part to Carla, Sam is finally found and Nick takes him to hospital where Sam is assessed and required to remain in hospital for treatment. The diagnosis is schizophrenia and Sam is put on medication. Nick is mortified to learn of his son's condition and tries to put on a brave face. He is also in a fragile state and lashes out at poor Ben who is only trying to help.

 

Kit is planning to ask Sarah to marry him but it may not pan out as Sarah is getting more and more frantic about something that only she and Gary know about. This seems to be connected with the investigation into Theo's murder. Maria has noticed Gary's strange behaviour (and the fact that he and Sarah seem be hugging every 10 seconds). Maria is convinced that Gary is having an affair. 

 

Speaking of Theo's murder, Summer is finally released from prison but she's taking out her anger on Ty for not corroborating her alibi.

 

Elsewhere, Betsy has received an offer to study at a fashion school in London. Dylan is cool with the idea but Betsy has yet to tell her Mom.

 

And, last but not least, Kirk insists that his dog (Peanut) can predict the winner of the FIFA World Cup. Maybe someone should tell Gianni Infantino...

 

And now for a few lines from the week that was: 

 

Gary's peace offering to Maria: 

"I bought you a Portuguese tart"

(thanks, but she's more interested in men)

 

Carl to Kev: 

"I'm straight now"

(someone tell James)

Izzy is surprised by Maria's suspicions about about Gary's affair:

"But Sarah's with fit Kit"

(legit!) 

 

Bernie to the girls re: Dev:

"We were at it like Bonobos"

(please, no monkey business) 

Sarah to Todd:

"I've made mistakes before"

(Really? I'm shocked!)

Debbie to Carl and Ronnie after hearing Fiona's threats:

"This gob on legs wants to know exactly what you've been up to"

(that's 'Ms.Gob on Legs' to you)

***

Well, fellow kilt konnoisseurs (i.e. Ryan), so ends another week. What exactly is the deal with Jodie? She seems to exist solely to create chaos. Isn't it time for her to move on? Just wondering. Thanks for dropping by. All the best and have a great week. 

Coronation Street Catch Up: the Carla's drawers edition

your irreverent update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

So, first, Ty says he doesn't remember seeing Summer on the night Theo died.

Now, after some tough love from Fiz, he tells the police that, 'oh yeah, actually I do remember seeing Summer that night. I just didn't remember 'cause I was quasi-bladdered'.

 

Well, that's good enough for Kit and Lisa.

  

That's good news for Summer (thank goodness) but it's not exactly a vote of confidence in the murder investigation. 

 

Certainly Summer has lost faith in the course of justice and she even stops taking insulin in order to get out of jail. She winds up in hospital where a distraught Todd tries to comfort her.  Fortunately, with an alibi from Ty (better late than never), she'll be out of jail.

 

So now the focus of the investigation turns toward Gary. 

 

There's no doubt that Gary has been acting very suspiciously. Maria has certainly noticed and so has Kit who has returned (how was Wales, by the way?)  So far there's no evidence to link Gary to Theo's murder (except that Gary hated bullies). But there's definitely something going on as Gary and Sarah seem to be in cahoots and having surreptitious tête-à-têtes every ten minutes. The twosome definitely have something to hide (and I don't think it's an illicit legover).

 

Elsewhere, we're happy to see that Carl has made a complete recovery from his crushed-by-a-car ordeal. 

 

Crushed by a car?!! Relax! It was just an accident (Ty tripped over the jack supporting the car and "oops"!). But Carl now points the finger at Ty and learns that Ronnie was also involved. Now Carl has some damning info, but wait! Ty also has a video of Carl tampering with Kev's car so it's a bit of a stalemate,

 

Oh, and Carl tells Deb that he has a job offer from a garage in Eccles (free cake with every MOT?) They'd be foolish not to hire Carl with his sparkling resume of: fake MOTs, car theft, hit and run, and brake tampering: "When can you start?"

 

Speaking of Deb, she declines an all-expenses trip to Spain with her gal pals because she's concerned about her dementia and prefers to stay close to home.

 

Elsewhere the evil Roy spectre continues to plague young Sam and encourages him to do bad things. This all culminates in Sam running away from Will, locking himself inside the Caf and hitting the real Roy with a chair. His family frantically tries to get into the locked caf. When they do burst in, Sam runs off and cowers in the precinct, haunted by the evil hallucinations in his head.  At least now his friends and family will realize that he has serious mental health problems. 

 

And now for a few lines from the week that was:

 

Gary to Kit re: the dumpster outside his yard:

"Let me tell you something about skips"

(I'm all ears) 

Mary to Todd:

"I think I would have made a good undertaker"

(she'd be appreciated by the deceased)  

Ty confesses to Fiz:

"I was the one who nearly killed Carl"

(but he's okay now and back to his old nasty self) 

Evil Roy to Sam:

"I cannot mentor a void"

(for that you'll need a mentor who specializes in voids)

Sarah wants Gary to fix Ms. Connor's desk in the factory:

"Don't forget Carla's drawers"

(he certainly won't be able to now) 

Ty to Fiz:

"Everyone's a copper"

(well, someone's got to do the job) 

Evil Roy to Sam:

"He's the Thane of Fife"

(Is that the guy who lives on Inkerman Street?) 

Terrified Sam repeats a mantra over and over:

"Sacrifice the knight"

(he's been hoodwinked into being Evil Roy's pawn)

 

***

Well, fellow Corrie compadres, so ends another week. Is Fiz's loving nickname for her husband, Mai Tai? Just asking. Anyway, thank goodness she convinced Ty to go to the police and tell the truth so Summer can be released. 

 

As for the question of who killed Theo, it looks like we're down to just a couple of suspects. The suspense continues...  Hey, thanks so much for spending time here at the Hip. Lovely to have your company and have a great week.

Coronation Street Catch Up: the troll's troll edition

 your irreverent update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

You've got to hand it to Leanne. She doesn't waste any time.

 

Despite Alya's warnings, and a whole load of relationship baggage, Leanne is getting mighty cozy with Coronation Street's latest shady Lothario, Idris. 

 

Idris is a self-proclaimed 'businessman' (I guess he left out the adjective 'dodgy') and he already has Brody doing his dirty work and he wants Adam to handle his legal affairs. Adam isn't keen.

 

Speaking of Adam, he is busy trying to teach Daniel a lesson in responsible parenting - in the worst possible way. 

 

Daniel is currently engaging in a marathon bout of self loathing, self hatred and self pity.

The only solution? Alcohol and lots of it. Why? Well, first it was a meltdown on his first day back at school after being taunted by Jake and Lily. When Hope Dobbs is your only friend, you know you've hit rock bottom.

 

But soon after Daniel deduces that his social media nightmare is Jodie, the vicious person behind all those horrible truthteller posts. Daniel confronts Jodie in the Rovers and sends her packing (back to Shona and David's) 

 

But, you ask, what about Bertie? 

 

Good question. The poor lad is subjected to an absent, neglectful Dad and only a pair of headphones keeps him from hearing the scorn and scolding from Ken, Tracy and Adam. The final straw comes when Bertie tries to microwave his dinner (while Daniel is passed out).  Adam enters the flat only to find that the microwave has exploded and he brings Bertie back to the Barlow house - ostensibly to teach Daniel a lesson. 

 

Of course, Daniel finally wakes up, discovers that Bertie is missing and is frantic with worry. When Daniel confronts Adam, Danny boy tries to punch Adam but only succeeds in clobbering poor Ken. 

 

Meanwhile, Jodie is back at Platt central and (as is her habit) and immediately starts lying and messing with David's head by insisting that David called her name on the night he mistook her for Shona.

 

But the main story continues to be Summer's ordeal in jail as no other suspect has come to light. Summer is seriously thinking about pleading guilty (even though she's innocent) as she would receive a shorter jail sentence.

 

Ty could provide an alibi (as he can vouch for Summer's innocence on the night Theo died) but he is told by Ronnie to keep quiet or he'll get them both in trouble. Seems that Ty was the one that (accidentally) kicked the jack out from the car that Carl was sabotaging. Then Ronnie told Ty to scarper and he would clean up the mess (i.e. take Carl to the hospital and leave him in the parking lot).

 

However Carl is now out of the hospital and walking around making Ty uncomfortable as he smells a rat.

 

Meanwhile there's a new lead in the case. Todd's missing phone is recovered and Lisa is surprised at the clue it reveals. Could this help find the real killer and get Summer released? 

 

And now for a few lines from the week that was:

 

Leanne warns Idris:

"I've been burned in the past by questionable men"

(so why not one more time?)

Lisa to Ryan and Carla:

"I do know how to do my job"

(Really? We're kind of skeptical) 

 

Idris to Alya: 

"Business makes the world go round"

(what about dodgy business?) 

Adam tells Summer her case doesn't look good:

"I spent hours looking at the evidence"

(Hours? There were only two pieces of evidence: a broach and a witness)

Daniel has a meltdown in school, then goes ballistic when he sees Megan:

"It's broken. Everything's broken"

(well, your microwave certainly is)

Adam to Jodie re video of Daniel at school:

"Hope Dobson is his guardian angel"

(sad) 

 

Daniel rejects Jodie's "I'm sorry":

"Three meaningless syllables"

(maybe she could add an emoji?)

 

Rita to Leanne re: her new beau:

"Is Idris a good kisser?"

(based on his blatant womanizing, Rita may find out first hand)

Daniel's description of Jodie:

"A troll's troll"

(so, like a super troll?)

***

Well, fellow Daniel detractors, so ends another week. Let's hope Daniel can pull himself together and let's hope that D.S. Swain can finally figure out that Summer is not the prime suspect in the killing of Theo. Thanks for stopping by and have a great week.

Coronation Street Catch Up: the appeasement never works edition

your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

Good work, D.S. Swain!

 

You've cleverly ruled out David the Dog, Bertie, Dorin and Harry as prime suspects in the murder of Theo. 

 

So who does that leave? 

 

Gary (smashed up Theo's van)? George (had a violent argument with Theo)? Danielle (aggrieved ex-wife)? Christina (dodgy alibi)? Todd (asked Gary to "warn off" Theo)? Tyrone (lied when asked to corroborate Summer's alibi)?

 

Nope. Nope. Nope. 

 

Swain decides instead to arrest Summer and charge her with murder based on George's observation and a broach. Summer is arrested, questioned, and remanded without bail (by the way, where's her lawyer? Maybe Adam could ditch Megan and take on Summer's case?)

 

Not since Swain threw Roy Cropper into jail has there been such a bone-headed police bungle. The way things are going, Summer could wind up in Debbie's old jail cell with Lou as a pal.

 

Todd is outraged by this miscarriage of justice and is now at odds with Christina and George whose statement gave Swain the cockamamie idea to arrest Summer. 

 

While we're on the subject on boneheadedness, Jodie has reached new heights of deceit and mayhem as she wrecks Daniel's life (more than he has). Posting on social media as "truthteller", she sparks a cavalcade of abuse on Daniel for being involved with a pedophile (Megan). 

 

This culminates in Daniel being attacked by two human trolls bearing ketchup. Poor Bertie is suffering because of Daniel's meltdown and Jodie seems to be actually experiencing a human emotion (a first?) Could it be remorse?

 

Apart from that, say hello to a new gangster in town as Idris waltzes into Weatherfield, chows down at Speed Daal, reconnects with cousin Alya, and flirts with Leanne. Brody is quite impressed by the Big Man and quickly agrees to do some of Idris' dirty work. Not a nice fella.

Over at the Rovers, Will is in a bad way and ends up on a roof with a bottle of booze. Asha manages to talk to him and Maggie climbs up to convince him to come down. Ben is grateful to Maggie and reluctantly invites her to rejoin the family. Meanwhile Megan is trying to contact Will.

 

And now for some lines from the week that was: 

Mary to George and Christine re: tension in the house:

"My antennae are never wrong"

(must be VHF) 

Todd to Sarah and Bethany:

"I asked Gary to warn off Theo the night Theo died" 

(maybe Gary didn't hear the word "warn"?) 

Sarah re: Gary:

"He's such an idiot"

(no offence)

 

Daniel to Jodie re: social media trolls:

"appeasement never works"

(just ask Nevllie Chamberlain)

Gary criticizes George's list of suspects:

"Who's next on the list, George? David the dog?"

(the dog has an airtight alibi. He was pooping on the Red Rec. A schnauzer can vouch for him) 

 

Roy to Brian and Shona after his toy train is broken by Ty's kids:

"Would everyone kindly refrain from telling me how to polish my train?"

(he's on the right track) 

Ken tries to tell Daniel to calm down:

"You've got a son!"

(oh yeah! Thanks for the reminder) 

Daniel to Jodie and Ken:

"What kind of a father am I?"

(how much time do you have?)

Daniel re: the horrible people posting vile messages about him:

"I'm going to find these people and I'm going to kill them"

(please don't give Swain more work. She's already in over her head)

***

Well, fellow Summer supporters, so ends another week. We seem to have a new character (Idris) even though we never asked for one. And he seems to be in the same mold as Harvey, Damon and Callum). Looks like Leanne might get involved with another bad boy. Couldn't we have a nice philanthropist show up on the Street? Just for a change? Oh well, thanks so much for spending time here at the Hip. Always lovely to have you aboard. Have a great week.