Coronation Street Catch Up: the Frozen Leg Over edition

your one-stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...


Where was I last week, you ask?  I admit I skived off but frankly I'm also a little cheesed off at some of the desperate story lines these days.

Do we really need to stoop to stories of kids in peril (Jack and sepsis) or animals getting hurt (Eccles and the poisoned sausages)? I can't even watch the scenes with poor little Jack (who had his foot amputated) and Kevin.

Then there's Johnny Connor acting like a buffoon and trying to win custody of baby Susie because he's racked with grief over his dead son. He attends a mediation session with Eva but it looks like the baby will be staying with Eva for the time being, while Johnny rails at Jenny and tells Liz that his marriage to Jenny is over.

Toyah is upset that Peter stooped to stealing baby Susie's birth certificate and passed it on to Carla to show that Eva intended to give her baby away.

Over at the Websters, Sally got herself into trouble by helping a shady con man get council money for a phony charity. She resigns as mayor of Weatherfield.

Ches is falling for Gemma but not expressing his true feelings. Cathy and Brian decide to open a DIY store (little do they know that it's been done before by Sally and a former beau named Danny and failed).

Sean has fallen on hard times and has no place to stay although he seems to be hanging on to his job at the Rovers. Robert and Michelle get temporarily trapped in the Bistro's freezer (don't ask why).

Evil Kayla (spawn of Neil the bad copper) leaves the gas on in Craig's apartment and leads everyone to believe that Craig's OCD is responsible. Alya is trying to keep the factory afloat after Kirk and Beth's skulduggery.

And now a few lines from the week that was:

Sally ponders the image which will accompany her mayor scandal story
"I wonder which photo they're going to use of me"

(the bad one)

Johnny to Liz:
"I thought we had something"

(not really)

Mary to Shona:

"I think my toaster teacake is burning"

(that's not a euphemism)

***

Thanks for sticking with me and for coming back. Fair warning. I could be skiving again next weekend, but I'll try to check in before I leave. In the meantime, maybe we'll get some decent story lines to talk about. All the best. Cheers!

Coronation Street Catch Up: the Lord of the Rings edition

your one-stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

There have been some evil villains on Coronation Street (Richard Hillman, Tony Gordon, Pat Phelan) but Tyler the thug takes the cake.

Tyler isn't too happy that Simon grassed him up following his assault of poor old Flora. As payback, Tyler has his sights set on Eccles! That innocent Barlow pooch is now the target of goodness knows what insidious plot.

Elsewhere poor Jack is very ill and it took a while for the doctors to correctly diagnose the problem: sepsis. Also Kevin is seriously tanned. Not sure what the doctors are doing about that.

On the lighter side, Daniel and Sinead come up with the idea of a 50's theme party as a going away celebration for Flora who is going to live in a posh seniors residence. Flora is using part of her inheritance to give Sinead and Daniel 13,000 pounds to start a vintage clothing shop.

Meanwhile Steve is trying desperately to find the original engagement ring which he gave to Tracy because she thinks it's a romantic gesture. The only snag is that Steve-o, a veritable Lord of the Rings, has been married so many times that he's not sure which ring in his vast collection is the correct one. Other snag: Tracy thinks Ken has offered to pay for her wedding. He hasn't.

David is apprehensive about his community service. Seb and Faye seem to be getting back together again. Maria is becoming increasingly dissatisfied with her role at Audrey's salon.

Ryan keeps losing jobs and is also trying to date Bethany.

And now for a few lines from the week that was:

Dev to an agitated Steve who can't find Tracy's old engagement ring:
"Don't take it out on me because you've got more rings than Saturn"
(and don't get me started on Uranus)

Tracy admires the ring which Steve bought which is actually Karen's ring:
"Look at the size of that rock"
(... in Steve's head)

Mary describes Steve:
"handsome in a weather-beaten sort of way"
(well, you're half right. He's certainly weather-beaten)

Michelle to Robert when she sees Steve dressed as the King:
"Elvis has entered the building"
(Don't be cruel)

***

Well, fellow fans, so ends another week on a rather sinister note as Tyler feeds some of Roy's sausages to an unsuspecting Eccles. As if the fat and calorie content of those meat products wasn't bad enough, methinks there's something harmful to dogs in that deadly charcuterie.  Have a great week and thanks for stopping by.

Coronation Street Catch-Up: the England versus Sweden edition

your one-stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...


Was anyone on Coronation Street actually supporting Sweden in the World Cup?

Possibly the Street's contrarian and resident fussbudget Norris Cole (where is he anyway?) and, on an intellectual level, I suppose Ken would point out the admirable qualities of Swedish literature (Strindberg) and music (ABBA), but I think we can safely assume that les punters were 100% behind the three lions.

Speaking of Corrie (finally! - ed), I don't know about you but I miss the old Ryan. You know, the lovable mop top lad who loved his Mom and music and then went away to study. In his place, we now have Exhibit A, the new Ryan: skiver, chancer and drinker.

Ryan is skint and living with Michelle. He got and then lost a job at Speed Daal and is now trying it on with Bethany Platt. On the plus side, Ryan has figured out that Kayla (who is actually the daughter of scumbag copper Neil) is up to something as she tries to worm her way into Craig's affections.

Elsewhere, the Connors vs. Eva battle continues. Johnny has an entente with Eva which only lasts an episode last because Johnny then finds a DNA test paper which says that Adam is the father of baby Susie. However the DNA test is a fake made by Adam as an option for Eva (which Eva declines).

Peter is adamant that he wants to sell his half of the Rovers even though Toyah tries for a reconciliation.

Meanwhile, Flora, mother of the late Harvey (Vinny), has inherited 250,000 pounds from Vinny's estate. Steve is taking a dim view of Abby and the shenanigans going on at Eileen's house. Abby is upset because it seems it will be awhile before she can regain custody of her kids.

Mike is trying to get close to Liz but wonders about her relationship with Johnny. Beth and Kirk remain split up because Kirk has been walking the dog of a woman who is much younger than Beth was led to believe.

And now for a few lines from the week that was:

Abby to Steve after her all-night bender:
"My mouth's like the bottom of a bird cage"
(and she ain't budgie-ing from Eileen's)

Flora makes a confession to Daniel:
"I can't stand pasta" 
(call it a bolognese malaise)

Ryan to Bethany:
"I know women"
(but not personally)

Mary to Adam:
"In this life you cannot expect happiness to just fall into your lap"
(especially at Tassels)

Ryan to Bethany in Audrey's Salon:
"You've got 20 minutes to make me look even better"

Bethany to Ryan:
"Put a bag over your head. Job done."

Beth to Kirk:
"To think I gave you the best six years of my life"
(but not consecutively)

Gemma tells Bethany she doesn't want to eat too much:
"What doesn't fill me makes me stronger"
(or at least thinner)

***

Well, Fellow Footie Fanatics, so ends another week as Coronation Street continues and the World Cup is coming to an end. Thanks so much for stopping by and have a great week. Cheers!