Coronation Street Catch Up: the Goodbye to No. 1 Coronation Street edition

your one-stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...


Say it ain't so!

CBC is reducing its weekly Corrie schedule from five days a week (with two episodes on Friday) to just three episodes a week (Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday). I think this rationing reflects the fact that Corrie has shut down production in the U.K. due to coronavirus.

As we all seek a short interlude of distraction during these tough times, Coronation Street has been a wonderful refuge (Geoff notwithstanding) but I guess we'll make do with a trio of episodes for the time being.

Speaking of the Monster Magician, Geoff continues his control of Yasmeen by creating a rift with Alya and then convincing Yasmeen to sell her (their) stake in Speed Daal in order to leave and live in Cypress. I wish someone like Tim would wake up and clue into the fact that his Dad is an abusive monster, but I'm not holding my breath.

Ali has recovered from his spiked drug drink (thanks Sharon) and has decided to leave the Street. The moody medic wishes Maria good luck and says he will be back for his court date after being charged with assault for beating up Gary. Exit Ali.

Lets's turn now to bats. Yes, I said bats. Roy resigns from the WBS (Weatherfield Bat Society) in disgust because of small-minded snide comments from fellow Batmen about his niece. Nina discovers the truth and she and Roy seem to be forging a connection based on a common love of the nocturnal mammals.

Perhaps the biggest news of the week is the departure of Ken Barlow from Coronation Street. A poignant and touching story which many thought would never happen but it seems that Claudia has succeeded in luring Ken into the luxo retirement home.

The couple are welcomed by the Stillwater Literati and, as Ken entertains the punters with a reading, who should pop up like an annoying mole in a sweater vest but Norris Cole!  Oh my! Maybe retirement isn't so great after all.

Back on the Street, Gemma is overwhelmed by the challenge of baby care and it seems that Bernie, her Mom, is back to help. ("Bernie" and "help" are two words that you don't generally find in the same sentence).

Elsewhere, Toyah is out of a job for helping Ali cover up his drug problem. Craig is trying to lose weight. James tells the football club PR guy to issue a statement denying that he's gay (James not the PR guy).

And now for some lines from the week that was:

Ken as he leaves his longtime home:
"Goodbye number one Coronation Street"
(so long Ken. it won't be the same without you)

Geoff tries to convince Yasmeen to go to Cypress:

"We could skip this miserable old country"

(I'm sure the feeling is mutual)

One of Stillwater's residents breaks some bad news:

"Roger had a fall playing Yahtzee"

(one of the most violent contact sports. Makes hockey look like chess)

Ken to Claudia who is trying to get rid of Ken's possessions:

"You're not going all Marie Kondo on me"

(her hair is certainly taking up a lot of space)

Ken tells Audrey he has to leave Eccles behind:
"I could hardly choose Eccles over Claudia"

(tough choice though)

Alya traces the bad reviews to Geoff because of a telltale typo:
"How do you spell Paneer, Geoff?"

(can you use it in a sentence?)

Claudia complains to Ken about his collection of books:
"Why did I have to pack three copies of Dostoevsky's The Idiot?"

(maybe to make a point?)

Ken to Eccles:
"Maybe I could smuggle you in my suitcase?"

(Now that's a good story line)

***

Well, faithful followers, so ends another week. I wish Ken well at Stillwater. Not sure it's his cup of tea (or mine). Even less so with Norris around. But we'll see. Thanks so much for spending time here at the Hip. Always enjoy your company (social distancing notwithstanding). Stay safe and healthy and have a good (if not home-bound) week.