your one-stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...
Good
grief!
How many more potential Joel killers could there be? Now even Carla
looks suspicious. Who's next? Kirk? Maybe he slipped out for a kebab on the
night of Joel's murder?
Yes, the Joel murder suspects continue to pile up. Let's recap. Dee Dee is antsy and hiding something. Ed and Ronnie broke into Joel's flat and then ran away. D.S. Swain has bruises all over her body. Carla says she was out at the factory to make sure the lights were turned off.
It's all quite a conundrum for the lead detective, slippery Kit. Too bad Kit is a major control freak and seems intent on making life miserable for Swain who has been taken off the case but remains fixated on the investigation.
When Swain's daughter (Betsy) sees the bruises on her Mum's body, she demands to know what's going on. Lisa fobs her off with a couple of cock-and-bull stories but Betsy knows she's lying and Carla (who knows that Lisa was struck by a car while pursuing a thief) may spill the beans.
Of course, it would help if Kit focused on his work instead of trying to worm his way into Daisy's good books. Naturally Kit can't rely on his own limited personal charm. Instead he sneakily extracts info from Daisy's ex, Ryan, for details about Daisy's likes and dislikes. Then the duplicitous detective pretends to espouse the same preferences as Daisy, much to her delight. So it seems that his 'smarm offensive' is working.
Meanwhile, things go from bad to worse for D.S. Swain when she learns a complaint has been made against her and she rages at Daisy and Kit.
Now let's back up a bit and talk about Gail.
Congrats are in order (I guess) as Gail proposes to Jesse-come-lately and he accepts. This happens after Jesse confronts David who is revealed to be the thief who stole Damon's stash of cash - presumably in an effort to buy Gail's house. Armed with this knowledge, Jesse has the leverage to quell David's constant criticism and move ahead with his plans to wed the fair Gail.
Sarah and Audrey are not amused.
Speaking of not being amused, Bernie gives Dev the heave-ho after discovering that Chesney has been laid off (while the Kebab shop is closed due to health violations). Dev tries to make up with a cringy entertainment act during the quads' birthday, culminating in a marriage proposal (to Bernie not the quads) which is rejected.
Billy thinks he's ready to resume his arch deacon duties but then finds he's not up to it. (By the way, if Billy ever gets a big promotion, he could be known as 'Billy Bishop'. Just saying...)
Where was I?
Oh yes, over at Ken's, Adam and Steve discover that Ken had a big windfall of cash from his premium bonds (all I ever got was stamps). Steve and Adam are concerned that Ken is being fleeced by Cassie and it is left to Steve (who coincidentally just had a legover with Cassie) to confront her. Cassie is outraged and Ken informs the lads that it's his money and he'd like to enjoy it before it's too late.
And now for a few lines from the week that was:
Dev to Bernie:
"Bernadine Winter, will you marry me?"
(evidently not)
"...spending the rest of her life with a man who thinks waistcoats are cool"
(that would be Dev)
Mary, paraphrasing a morning TV host who let a cat escape from his arms:
"I'm not a professional pussy holder"
(no comment)
"I've lost my zip"
(try using buttons or Velcro)
Billy to the bishop:
"I don't think I can be an arch deacon anymore"
(how about a semi-arch deacon?)
Gail tells Jesse about something she read in a magazine:
"Apparently Hugh Bonneville likes to put marmalade in his spaghetti Bolognese"
(and Marmite on his waffles)
Audrey to Gail:
"Health, wealth and happiness eh? Well, one out of three isn't bad"
(Good odds for Lotto 649 too)
Betsy to Lisa:
"Did you kill Joel?"
(if you mean Billy Joel, then the answer is "no")
***
Well, fellow Kit Kritics, so ends another week. I do hope the mystery surrounding the killer of Joel gets cleared up soon. I guess we can only wait and see. Thanks for the pleasure of your company here at the Hip and have a great week.