Coronation Street Catch Up: The Queen of Dodgy edition

 your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

  

Another stressful week in Carla and Lisa's house (aka 'Temple of Gloom').

And, by the way, what did they do to Yasmeen's house? It's all dark and sombre like it was decorated by Ingmar Bergman. Although there is a nice poster of Mt. Yarigatake (in Japan) on the wall.

 

But I digress...

 

So Becky is back and seems to be determined to pop in every ten minutes (like Kramer at Jerry's apartment) to explain her 'not dead, just undercover' disappearance and make everything right. Becky claims she was trying to protect her family (Betsy and Lisa) from a dangerous gang. But Lisa is still furious with Becky for pretending she was dead and causing Betsy so much anguish.

 

Lisa wants Becky to stay away and she doesn't want Becky to see Betsy. However, while spying on her daughter, Becky reveals herself and shocks poor Betsy. Lisa is angry with Becky. Betsy is angry with Lisa for not telling her that her Mom was alive. Roy is angry with Carla for lying to him after he said he saw Becky. 

 

It's a whole mess.

 

Over at the Coronation Street Wing of Weatherfield General Hospital, Ty has a critical operation to remove a blood clot from his spine. It all goes well but the doctor warns that Ty's recovery and ability to walk again could take months. 

 

Evelyn and Cassie try to put a positive spin on the situation and reassure Hope and Ruby. Fiz thinks they might be sugarcoating the reality and giving the family false hope.

 

As for the felon responsible for the hit and run, it seems that Dylan and Brody are in the clear (for now) after CCTV provides them with an alibi. I'm not so sure about Carl who shows up at Ty's bedside with car magazines and a lot of sympathy. Is it because he's feeling guilty?

Certainly Kit has his suspicions about Carl's fishy activities.

 

Speaking of Carl, he's not having much luck with his car stealing operation and his overlord (overlady?), Fiona, is not impressed. Carl continues to string Abi along (albeit at arm's length) and tries to pay off Tracy with a paltry 500 pounds (instead of the 10K that Tracy wants). If he doesn't pay up, Tracy says she will tell Kevin that his wife has been sleeping with his brother.

 

Still on the subject of Tracy, she enters her florist shop just in time to see a burglar rampaging through Preston's Petals. 

 

Todd and Theo move into their new flat but happiness is short-lived as Theo worries about his custody hearing and Todd reveals that he has so many skeletons in his closet... that he needs another closet. 

 

On top of that, Billy, George and Brian show up to help Todd unpack boxes while Theo is away. Of course, Theo shows up just as Billy is giving Todd a friendly hug. Oh oh! Cue one of Theo's rage episodes...

And now for some lines from the week that was:

 

Betsy tells Lisa she knows that Becky is alive: 

"Mom's not dead"

(yes, we know, she was in Spain) 

Tracy threatens to tell Kev about Carl and Abi:

"I knew you were a close family but not that close"

(they're just like the Waltons... only x-rated) 

Abi to Tracy:

"You're just a grubby little peeping Tom"

(what's your point?) 

Carl to Abi re: Tracy:

"Tracy is just a gob on stick"

(guilty as charged) 

Debbie's fave band: 

"The Ambiance and the Aura" 

(Weatherfield's answer to Spinal Tap) 

 

Abi to Carl:

"Fiona is the Queen of dodgy"

(..and Carl is the Duke of Devious)

Lisa to Becky:

"You spent four years pretending to be dead"

(and it was hard work) 

Fiona to Carl re: his car stealing prowess:

"You're so reasonable but so useless"

(thanks... I think) 

 

Carl to Abi:

"I want you all the time"

(except when I'm with James) 

Costello to Lisa re: Becky's situation:

"It's not a mystery, it's a tragedy"

(well it's certainly not a comedy) 

***

Well, fellow Corrie Caballeros, so ends another week. The Becky-Lisa-Carla situation continues and there seems to be no end in sight. But why is Roy so cheesed off by Carla's white lie? Seems very unRoy like. Oh well... thanks for sharing some time with us here at the Hip. Have a great week!

  

Coronation Street Catch Up: the sanctity of your general waste edition

your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

Breaking news!

Lisa's late wife is not dead. Apparently she was in Spain.

(it's a mistake anyone could make).

 

It seems Officer Becky went undercover to infiltrate one of the city's most heinous organizations (Manchester United?) and her death was faked. 

 

However, after four years of undercover work, her real identity was leaked and she had no choice but to hide out in Spain (I hear 'the running of the bulls' is lovely this time of year).

 

So, Becky shows up suddenly Chez Lisa and sends Officer Swain into a gobsmacked tizzy. Not to mention the fact that Lisa is currently engaged to nasal nymph Carla. Awkward!

 

Then there's the mystery of Tia Wardley who is somehow involved in all this. How does she fit in? 

 

All other happenings seem rather pedestrian in comparison to this somewhat fantastical tale but let's press on.

Poor Ty is in hospital after getting hit by a stolen car. Hopefully he'll be fine but he does have some serious injuries. 

 

Meanwhile the prime suspects are the Bonehead Brothers, Dylan and Brody, who are working with Carl on this illegal car stealing project.  The stolen car gets torched to destroy evidence but not before Dylan is spotted in the stolen car by George. And surely Betsy (who almost got hit by the same car) must have recognized the driver and passenger?

 

Speaking of George, he seems to be more and more entranced by the penniless Christina (although it seems she is well stocked with mascara). Hopefully he won't go down the same path as the legendary Fred Elliot who was ready to marry anything that moved.

 

In other news, David (renowned recycling enforcer) finds a positive pregnancy test in the bins and assumes it belongs to Betsy. Wrongo. Then he assumes it's Lily and gives her a right rollicking. Wrongo again. Finally, it's Shona who reveals that the pregnancy test is hers and she is, as they say, with child. Happy news, right? Unless we aren't sure who the Daddy is?

 

Maybe the ultrasound will give us a clue (if the image is very long, it could be the local tall cop. If the image is extremely short, it's probably the cranky hairdresser).  

Elsewhere Todd and Theo seem to be back together because Todd mistakenly believes that Theo is going to therapy sessions to work out his anger, kebab hatred, and personal demons. Sadly, the truth is Theo is not in therapy but he lied about it. So watch out for more fireworks ahead, especially if Billy continues to 'help' by sticking his beak in.

 

Debbie decided to take over the dementia choir and was promptly fired. However, she and Glenda have decided to form their own singing tandem. Can't wait to hear the results.

 

Some good news this week as Evelyn reappears and tries to help Roy deal with his ailing back. Speaking of Roy, he seems positive that he saw Becky at the hospital and tells Carla.

 

Betsy celebrates her 18th birthday by drinking copious amounts of alcohol. One wonders if she has any redeeming qualities.

 

And now for a few lines from the week that was:

 

Lisa to Becky who shows up suddenly:

"It's been nearly four years"

(and not even a postcard) 

Becky explains her absence to Lisa:

"I was in Spain"

(so, not dead?) 

Becky asks Lisa a question about a family member:

"Is she any taller?"

(No, Carla is about the same height)

Lisa introduces Becky to Carla:

"This is my wife"

(and this is my new wife)

Christina mourns the fact that the late Dom left her nothing:

"Whatever he had left, he left to a donkey sanctuary"

(ka-ching! Those donkey sanctuaries are raking it in) 

Evelyn to Carla and Lisa:

"Got loads of lesbians at uni"

(thanks for the politically incorrect info) 

Sally as she congratulates Lisa and Carla on their engagement:

"I have a lesbian daughter" 

(again, thanks for the politically incorrect info)

 

James tells Dee Dee that he's seeing people again

"Don't think I haven't got back on the horse by now" 

(And by horse, he means Carl)

 

Carla to David re: his fixation on garbage bins: 

"I promise not to encroach on the sanctity of your general waste ever again"

(... so help me God) 

Evelyn to Roy re: his back problems:

"I've got one word to say to you and that word is Pilates"

(unless that's the name of a bat, Roy's not interested) 

 

***

Well, fellow Weatherfield watchers, so ends another week. Many are finding the whole Becky story a little (how you say) hard to believe and unlike most Corrie stories which are generally a little more credible. However, on the bright side, it's great to see Evelyn reappear and add her wicked wit to the show. Thanks so much for the pleasure of your company and I hope you have a great week.  

Coronation Street Catch Up: the eucalyptus shower gel edition

your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

What's all this then?  

Carl in bed with... James?

OMG! That hotel room is getting more action than a Tom Cruise movie.

 

Yes, it seems that Carl's..um.. 'appetites' are quite voracious and he seems be a proponent of equal opportunity legovers. Where does he find the time? Tracy's trying to blackmail him, he owes everyone money, he's doing dodgy mechanic work, stealing cars, and playing away while Abi is on a pseudo-vacation with Kev. It must be exhausting.

 

Carl has also coerced Brody (and now Dylan) into his car stealing operation as he tries to generate some quick dosh to pay off Tracy.

 

George is suddenly becoming a sought-after male as Christina (Daisy's Mum) shows up on the Street and asks George to take care of funeral arrangements for her deceased partner (Dom). Jenny is immediately suspicious and thinks it's all a scam. To prove it, Jenny bursts into the funeral parlour and rips the lid off Dom's coffin only to find.... Dom. 

Oops!  

 

Meanwhile George is quite taken with Christina and seems to be falling under her spell.

 

Theo seems to be revealing himself to be a rather alarming - and violent - headcase. After a frustrating mediation session (who invited Noah anyway?) with Danielle, Theo wallows in self pity (and alcohol). He is angry to learn that Todd has been enjoying himself at the Rovers in the company of Billy. This after Todd has been banned from seeing Billy (by Theo) because Billy told police that Miles assaulted him.

 

In a rage, Theo tries to force feed Todd a kebab. It's a disturbing sight (and a waste of a kebab). Perhaps this will be the end of Todd and Theo as a couple (one can only hope).

 

In happier news, Carla and Lisa are finally engaged.

 

This comes after several failed attempts at a proposal by Carla. When Betsy tells Lisa that Carla wants to propose, Lisa decides to take the initiative and use valuable police resources (squad cars and megaphone) to propose to Carla outside Underworld. All's well that ends well except that it now seems that Kit knows more about the death of Lisa's late wife than he's letting on.

 

Elsewhere Asha is still struggling with the trauma she experienced during her last shift as a paramedic. Her partner is sympathetic but Asha seems reluctant to return to her duties.  

 

Oh, and Happy Birthday to Summer who turned 21 (she doesn't look a day over 12). 

And now for some lines from the week that was:

Debbie is not impressed with Tracy's insults:

"Mrs Lanky, Skanky, gob on a stick"

(and those are her good points) 

George to Christina after she spends the night (on his couch):

"Use my eucalyptus shower gel if you want"

(Wow, I guess it's serious if they're sharing shower gel) 

Ryan on a police megaphone to Carla:

"Stop in the name of love!"

(...before you break... rules regarding use of police resources)

Glenda to George re: gossip about Christina staying over at George's:

"It's a small street with a lot of big mouths"

(as opposed to a big street with a lot of small mouths) 

Abi to Tracy:

"Mates tend not to blackmail each other"

(yes, that's generally the case) 

Abi to Tracy:

"What exactly was it that made you such a vindictive cow?"

(A rhetorical question I presume?) 

Nina to Sienna re: her new drink invention:

"You'll love it. It's red wine and coke"

(Pass) 

***

Well, fellow Rovers Regulars, so ends another week. It was certainly a week of surprises (i.e. Carl and James) and it's nice to see that Carla and Lisa are engaged (although the chemistry between them still evades me). My fervent wish is that, on the eve of their marriage, Peter Barlow shows up. I know it's a long shot but one can always dream. 

 

Thanks so much for dropping by and spending time at the Hip. Have a great week! 

Coronation Street Catch Up: the devious, mucky cow edition

your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

Hey Miles!

How dare you knock Rev. Billy to the ground!

How's he supposed to stand up when he's wearing those tight pants?

 

It's just the latest installment of the biblical battle between Noah (religious conversion therapist) and Rev. Billy (gay man of the cloth). Billy and Todd confront Noah (who is now getting it on with Theo's wife and playing happy families with Danielle, Miles and Millie). As the two church men swap quotes from the bible, Miles pushes Billy and Billy falls on his back on the cobbles. Where will it all end?

 

Of course Theo's no saint as he continually oscillates between rage and self-pity and is determined to sabotage Todd's friendship with Billy. 

 

Elsewhere, the long goodbye continues for Aadi who is being dispatched to Mumbai to do who knows what with cousin Vikram. Dev (whose brilliant idea it was to exile his son for past misdeeds) is now having second thoughts at the thought of Aadi leaving.

 

Meanwhile Asha is having a difficult time adjusting to her job as a paramedic and now having panic attacks and flashbacks. Asha desperately wants Aadi to stay but has yet to express her feelings to him.

 

Bernie remains absent as she is on her solo honeymoon (how does that work? Does she get a cut rate on the honeymoon suite? Does she carry herself over the threshold?)

 

But the big news of the week is Tracy (and Abi and Carl). Tracy's snooping finally pays off as she spies Carl and Abi smooching. Tracy is delighted and confronts the torrid twosome. But, because Tracy is a generous and kindly person, she offers to stay quiet for the princely sum of 10K (she needs the money to pay for her divorce from Steve).

 

Abi tries to convince Tracy to stay quiet but no dice. Carl then engages Brody to help him do some illegal car-related activity in order to generate the money he needs to pay off Tracy. Coincidentally (or not), Dev and Aadi are shocked to find that Aadi's car has been stolen and was involved in a crash.

 

Dee Dee finally reveals everything to Ollie regarding her baby and Joel. She expects Ollie to break off their budding romance but Ollie doesn't seem deterred. Meanwhile, Dee Dee is also working on Ollie's legal file that maintains his car accident was caused by a faulty MOT.  Hmm, sounds like the work of quasi-mechanic Carl...

 

And now for some quotes from the week that was:

 

Abi to Carl who prefers snogging to breakfast:

"What about the toast?"

(no thanks, we don't want crumbs in the bed) 

 

Carla's suggestion to Lisa to punish David for crimes against recycling:

"Nip and get your Taser and zap him between the legs"

(don't give her any ideas) 

Tracy spies Abi and Carl snogging through a translucent door of the kitchen.

"You devious, mucky cow"

(you'll have to be more specific) 

 

Tracy again:

"If you're thinking of having a secret tryst with your brother's wife, try not to do it in front of a see-through door"

(snappy aphorism. Get that printed on a t-shirt) 

 

Tracy to Abi re: Carl:

"What's he like in bed?"

(horizontal, I would think) 

Abi to Tracy:

"My heart beats quicker when I see Carl"

(must be the coffee from Roy's)

 

Tracy to Abi re: her relationship with Tommy O.: 

"It was exciting but it didn't last"

(she got kicked into touch by a footballer) 

 

Noah to Miles re: Billy and Todd:

"The Bible does say that animals travel in twos"

(but you and Miles also travelling in twos) 

***

Well fellow Kebab Kolleagues, so ends another week. Will Aadi actually leave for Mumbai or will there be a last minute change of plan? Inquiring minds (and British Airways) want to know. Thanks so much for spending time here at the Hip and, as always, have a great week.  

Coronation Street Catch Up: the blow dry boy edition

 your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street... 

 

 

Well, well... Kale has finally made its appearance on Coronation Street (in a good way) probably for the first time in the show's history.

 

The robust, leafy green is an essential ingredient in Debbie's new, healthy smoothie (along with cucumber and avocado), part of Debster's new healthy lifestyle. But, at the same time, Deb is contending with the stresses of her hotel business (assisted by Ryan) and the well-meaning (but unwelcome) interventions of her fiance, Ronnie.

 

Speaking of 'hotel business', this seems to be the location of Carl's Canoodling Chamber (aka the hotel room where he's currently residing). While scheduling a legover with Abi, Carl is ambushed by libidinous Tracy. Carl wards off Torrid Trace with a phony 'dicky tummy' story. (BTW, 'Dicky Tummy' is also the name of my accountant). 

 

However, Carl is miffed when he discovers Abi has had martial relations with (wait for it) her husband! How dare she! Carl is even more miffed when he discovers Abi is heading off on vacation to sunny climes with Kev et famille. As a petty revenge tactic, Carl arranges a date with Tracy to make Abi jealous... and it seems to be working.

 

Over at Underworld, Sarah's plan to use a sultry sales pitch on a potential customer falls flat. Not only that, but the customer (Eli) also accuses Sarah of sexual harassment. Maybe the fact that Eli was harassed by a zealous copper (Kit) had something to do with it. 

 

Speaking of Kit, seems David's vendetta with the Brobdingnagian bobby is heating up. David ambushes Eli and tells him that Kit is a rogue copper and that Eli should report him. Meanwhile Kit's boss (Costello) assigns Kit to desk duty so he can "protect" him - whatever that means. Lisa has her suspicions but hasn't yet figured out what's going on between Costello and Kit.

 

Dee Dee wants to work part-time for Adam and suggests that Adam hire Alya to help out at the law firm. Adam isn't sure that the new arrangement will work. At the same time, Dee Dee is interested (romantically) in a new client but resists the idea of pursuing a relationship because of her past history with Joel.

 

Elsewhere, Steve's unwelcome stay at Ty and Fiz's comes to an abrupt end after his babysitting assignment with Dorin ends in a panic. Dorin can't be found (Steve thought Dorin might have hidden in an old fridge that was carted away to the dump) but fortunately Dorin turns up in the backyard.  The whole episode provides a diversion for Carl to destroy Hope's phone which contains an incriminating photo of him and Abi. 

 

But Carl's exploits could all be for nought as Tracy finally figures out that the object of his desire... is Abi.

One can only hope that Tracy's integrity and discreet personality will prevail and she'll keep this information to herself.

 

...I'm kidding of course. 

 

I'm sure the news will be all over the Street before you can say "hotpot".

 

And now for a few lines from the week that was: 

 

Sarah justifies her sexy sales pitch : 

"We sell underwear to mainly men"

(you mean men are wearing Underworld knickers?) 

 

Tracy tells Carl why she's up for a legover:

"Bad things happen when I'm bored"

(bad things also happen when she's not bored)

Debbie reveals her recipe for smoothies: 

"It's kale, avocado and cucumber"

(What? No bacon barm cake?) 

Kit tells David to get lost:

"Jog on blow dry boy"

(wasn't that the name of Batman's other sidekick?) 

Tracy guesses the name of Carl's secret love:

"She wears overalls and stinks of motor oil"

(it's either Ty in drag or Abi) 

Carla to Deb and Lisa:

"I'm not brittle, heartless or jaded"

(despite what it says on her business card) 

Abi to Carl re: their secret tryst: 

"The whole thing's a death wish"

(it is now that Tracy knows about it) 

Shona warns David to stop winding up Kit:

"I will put your head in the fryer if you don't leave him alone"

(that could improve his hair style) 

Cassie wants Steve to repeat his sexy dance at Dev's stag:

"I'll be your pole"

(you mean like Lech Wałęsa or Chopin?) 

***

Well, fellow Street savants, so ends another week. I can only imagine what mayhem will ensue now that Tracy has guessed the name of Carl's legover partner. Thanks for the pleasure of your company here at the Hip. Have a great week!

Coronation Street Catch Up: the tonsil tennis edition

 your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

So let me get this straight.

 

Dev thinks that's Aadi's problems stem from a lack of fatherly love and support... so the solution is to provide even less fatherly love and support - by shipping Aadi off to Mumbai. 

 

Huh.

 

Dev's strange solution comes after Aadi finally confesses the whole extent of his misdeeds (large business losses, fake robbery, crazy party and, finally, the unfortunate drug incident involving Lauren).

 

The whole Aadi situation puts a damper on the Dev/Bernie wedding at the Bistro - but not as much as Bernie's sudden illness and breathing problems (the result of allergies caused by the bridal bouquet). Fortunately the couple overcomes this minor hiccup and enters into marital bliss - despite the fact that Bernie covered up Aadi's debts, tried to skim off wedding money to cover Aadi's debts, and tried to get Brody hired to run Dev's fish and chip shop).   

 

One bright light for Aadi is the fact that he and Amy finally get together. All is peachy until Lauren decides to tell police that Aadi spiked her drink at that fateful party. This prompts Lauren to confront Aadi about his lies and duplicity which then causes Amy to doubt Aadi's integrity and honesty.

 

Meanwhile, over at the builders yard, Theo decides to do a little violent re-arranging of tools and equipment as he rages over Noah and how he ruined his life and usurped his family. Gary is sympathetic to Theo's plight and vows to teach Noah a lesson but is interrupted but the unexpected arrival of Maria.

Over at cringe-worthy love central (aka Steve and Cassie), Steve urges Cassie to let him stay at the home of Ty and Fiz. This after Steve moves out of Ken's place due to Tracy's deceit during divorce proceedings. Ty reluctantly agrees but Fiz is none too thrilled especially with all the 'snogging Olympics' going on whenever Steve and Cassie are within tongue-distance.

 

At Kev's garage, Kev is busy fixing cars while Abi and Carl are setting up legover dates but they have to be careful because Ty and/or Kev might spot them together. You think Kev might be tipped off when Abi shows up at the garage looking super-glam instead of wearing greasy overalls.

 

George's first internet date falls flat when his mystery match turns out to be an old school friend of Glenda's. However Jenny seems interested in George although she won't admit it.

 

Over at their new house (Yasmeen's old house), Carla and Lisa (and Ryan and Betsy) are settling in and Carla has plans to propose to Lisa. Will Peter be invited to the wedding?

 

And now a few lines from the week that was:

 

Todd can't believe that Gary was sensitive about Theo's angry outburst:

"Gary Windass? The walking testosterone molecule?"

(he can be quite sensitive.. when he's not beating up people) 

Gary to Theo re: his plan to punish Noah:

"I know what I'm doing"

(No he doesn't) 

Gary (again) to Theo:

"I'm not a caveman"

(Yes he is)

 

Kev to Abi (who says she has a migraine):

"Go home. Get yourself tucked up in bed"

(with Carl) 

Brian opines on mortality:

"In the midst of life we are in death"

(sounds like he was at the 'Dog and Gun' recently) 

Fiz can't stand Steve and Cassie's persistent mouth-to-mouth non-resuscitation:

"Any more tonsil tennis from them..I swear"

(the phrase 'get a room' springs to mind... if only Steve could find one) 

Bernie to Dev after they tie the knot:

"Looks like the untameable has been tamed"

(Quick, call David Attenborough. This could be a new documentary)

Bernie vows that she and Dev will never be normal:

"What is normal? It's a just cycle in the washing machine"

(although 'delicate' might be a better option) 

 

Jenny to George:

"I've never had anyone fix my leaky o-ring before"

(it usually requires a medical professional) 

Jenny to Rita and Ryan re: George:

"I am not interested in Eileen Grimshaw's sloppy seconds"

(neither was Eileen, it seems)

 

***

Well, fellow Dev-otees (and Detractors), so ends another week. Looks like Aadi just can't catch a break. Poor fella seems destined to be shipped off to Mumbai. As for Theo, that eerie smile gives me the creeps - Todd should be careful.  Thanks so much for stopping by and spending time at the Hip. All the best and have a great week!

Coronation Street Catch Up: the under-cooked prawn curry edition

 your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

 

If Summer married into Bernie's family, would she be Summer Winter? 

(just asking)

 

As for the Dev-Bernie wedding, well let's just say it was unusual.

 

First there was the arrival of Auntie Rani, a severe lady who takes a dim view of Bernie and her friends. Then there's Bernie's plan to skim off money from Aunties' 25K wedding gift to help Aadi pay off debts he incurred while mismanaging Dev's shop. That plan seems to go awry when Auntie leaves suddenly before the wedding after Dev publicly admonishes her for calling Bernie "common".

 

The actual wedding went ahead... slowly.

 

Bernie was late because she caught Brody burgling Dev's house (apparently he was desperate to raise cash to run away to Spain with his sisters). No matter, Debbie managed to entertain the impatient guests with a stunning - extended play - vocal performance (Hopelessly Devoted to You). For an encore, she proposed to Ronnie (he accepted BTW) before Bernie showed up. One must say that Bernie's outfit was quite..um.. arresting and her blonde blob bun was effervescent. 

 

But, hold on, as the ceremony got underway Bernie had trouble breathing. Could it be a panic attack?

Elsewhere the fallout from Kevin's lies (pretending he still had cancer) continues. When Debbie finds out, she is livid and disowns him and then, later, re-owns him. Kevin wants Carl to leave the garage and go back to Germany but he still seems to be hanging around. 

 

For Abi, Kev's lies seem to be the green light for her to jump into bed with Carl. Carl tries to break off his relationship with Abi lest Kevin shop him to the police. Carl reveals Kev's blackmail scheme to Abi and another legover ensues. Carl then confesses all his misdeeds (debts, fake MOTs. car theft) to Abi who walks out on him but returns to his hotel room. Despite her misgivings, I think you can guess what happens next (it starts with "leg" and ends with "over").

 

Over at Eileen's house, Todd seems to have one bad idea after another. Certainly busting in on Theo's family get-together to tell everyone that Danielle's snog-partner is Noah was not a brilliant idea. Then there was the summit meeting with Billy and Danielle that also went awry.  

 

The result?

Todd's sleeping on the couch (and it's his house!)

 

Poor James is no longer taking care of Laila as Dee Dee (as Laila's Mum) wants to be Laila's parent. James is ready to leave Coronation Street but Dee Dee tries to convince him to stay and help her raise Laila.

 

Lisa seems to be having a breakthrough in her therapy sessions as she struggles to decide whether her late wife (Becky) was corrupt. Nice to see that the therapy is finally helping but why does the therapist call someone and tell them about Lisa's breakthrough? And what is Kit's involvement in all this?

 

Meanwhile, Carla is trying to help Lisa and decides that one way is by visiting Logan Radcliffe in jail as apparently he and his brother may (or may not) know something about Becky's alleged corruption. One small snag. Logan wants 10K before he'll disclose any info but he gives Carla a tidbit of info for free.

Tim and Sally are worried about bruises on the arm of Shanice. Sally wants to call social services but Brody doesn't want social services involved because they might break up the family. Brody also attends a footie match with Kit as the two get to know each other.

And now for a few lines from the week that was:

 

Bernie to Nick as Dev does some pole dancing during his stag night:

"You'd be amazed at our bedroom athletics"

(try getting that image out of your head)

Mary recounts her India anecdote to the hen-do guests:

"I often wonder how my life would have turned out if I hadn't eaten that under-cooked prawn curry"

(fewer visits to the hospital ER?) 

Shona to Auntie Rani and hen-do guests:

"This hen-do is the worst thing ever"

(and she's married to David) 

Auntie Rani to Dev re: Bernie

"She is a common loudmouth"

(hold on! She's not common) 

Debbie is escorted by Ronnie and Roy:

"Shall I be luncheon meat between a Royston and Ronnie sandwich"

(please! I just had breakfast) 

Theo to Todd: 

"Either you sleep downstairs on the sofa or you'll never see me again"

(but it's Todd's house) 

 

Kev to Carl: 

"Go back to Germany"

(or you'll miss Oktoberfest) 

Logan Radcliffe is surprised to see Carla visit him in jail

"I've always been dead popular with lesbians"

(and the police) 

 

Theo's description of Rev Billy.

"Patron saint of sticking his beak in"

(Saint Nosy of Assisi?) 

Carl confesses his dodgy MOT activities to Abi:

"I've been doing it from Kev's garage"

(are we still talking about MOTs?)

 

***

Well, fellow pole dancing partisans, so ends another week. Sorry to see Auntie Rani leave so soon. Not sure what the end game is for Abi, Carl and Kev but it doesn't look good for Kev, the garage, Carl, Abi or the Federal Republic of Germany. Thanks so much for stopping by. Have a great week!