your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...
Just because Steve's Dad (Jim) has been in prison several times for assorted crimes (manslaughter, assault, attempted robbery) and has been a general waste of space, Steve doesn't seem to have a great relationship with his pater.
Quelle surprise.
Anyhoo, that maybe explains why Steverino now seems reluctant to visit dear old Papa when he learns Jim is in hospital.
But at least Steve has a new best buddy: Ben.
Yes, Steve and Ben are having a fine bromance. Tim is not best pleased. Maggie seems to take a dim view of Ben's new buddy (and pretty well everything).
Maggie also takes a dim view of Lauren and her budding friendship with Ollie. Lauren gets a bit freaked out at the prospect of dating Ollie and stands him up at the Bistro. Never mind. All customers who get stood up are entitled to one free dessert. Sweet!
Over at the prison, Carl visits Debbie and asks for a handout. Debbie asks Ronnie to make it happen. Ronnie is not pleased and can't get used to the fact that deadbeat Carl is actually (choke) his stepson! Where did he go wrong?
Meanwhile Carl is looking forward to getting his hands on cash from his Mum since she owes him, bigtime (according to Carl). And, when he's not squeezing money from Mumsy, Carl is enjoying the occasional legover with Jodie.
What's Jodie's deal anyway?
She's a bad influence on Lily (heaven knows Lily was no angel even before Jodie showed up). Jodie is also making Bernie's life miserable by encouraging Mad Mal to pursue Bernie. Then Jezebel Jodie burgles Bernie's house and does some demon decoupage on Bernie's wedding photo. What gives?
And I wouldn't be surprised if it was Jodie (not Hope) who stole Brian's valuable edition of 'Woman in White' by Wilkie (not Joan) Collins.
If that wasn't enough, Jodie is intercepted by a young girl who knows Jodie from a previous life. Jodie cooks up a cock and bull story about being in witness protection and tells the girl never to contact her again.
Jodie's most heinous crime to date?
Failing to pick up the poop left by David (the dog not the hairdresser). Fortunately Toyah is there to reprimand her.
Poor Sam is now in a dangerous situation as he tries to expose the inappropriate relationship between Will and Megan. Will invites Sam to a booze drinking session (Sam is caught by Daniel). Sam's ill-advised idea of catching Megan and Will "at it" on a secret video camera is thwarted by some B-movie panto-style acting from Megan and Will. Worse, Megan threatens to expose Sam as a peeping Tom. It's all too much for Sam as he spirals downward and eschews help from his Dad.
And now for a few lines from the week that was:
Maggie tries to dissuade Ollie from seeing Lauren:
"The woman is a mother"
(yes, you'd be surprised how often that happens)
"I'm in witness protection"
(maybe you were living in Spain with Becky?)
Shona to Jodie re: Carl:
"Why set the bar so low?"
(that's not just low, that's in the gutter)
Shona to Jodie:
"He's the Weatherfield Bike"
(an equal opportunity bike)
Steve to Cassie:
"I'm loved up in hetero heaven"
(I'm nauseous)
Steve to Cassie re:Tim:
"He can be very clingy"
(try using Bounce)
Ronnie to Carl:
"How do you sleep at night?"
(hanging upside down in a crypt)
Debbie to Carl:
"You're using me as your personal Golden Goose again"
(now, where are those golden eggs?)
Steve to Ben:
"Is it slow up or slow down?"
(time to consult AI)
Jodie to Carl, post-legover:
"Typical bloke. Easy to please"
(next time just buy him a pint. That works too)
Ronnie to Kevin re: dealing with Carl:
"We need to be smart"
(That's a tall order for those two)
***
Well, fellow Sam sympathizers, so ends another week. These days, it seems like there are too many bad people doing too many bad things (Jodie, Megan, Will, Maggie, Mal, Carl). Hopefully someone will help Sam and expose Megan. As for Jodie, perhaps Kit can figure out exactly where she came from and what she's up to. As for Carl... the sooner he returns to Germany, the sooner we can say Auf Wiedersehen!
Thanks for spending time with us at the Hip and have a great week!
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