14 top lines of 2014 on Coronation Street

please note: no spoilers were used in the preparation of this post

2014 has come and gone on Coronation Street. Just think back. A year ago, we were watching aging rock star Ritchie De Vries, we were tsk tsking at Peter's affair with Tina, we were wondering about Nick's brain injury, we were welcoming Kal to the Street and praying for Hayley.

Time to take a quick look at 14 of the quintessential lines of the year

  

The minister welcomes everyone to Hayley's funeral:

"We're here to celebrate the life of Hayley Ann Cropper"
(amen)

Maddie describes Norris:
"He's like Gollum without the personality"

(ouch, that's an insult to Gollum)

Beth does some quality research about her upcoming cosmetic surgery (ultimately cancelled):
"More people have their boobs done than have their tonsils out"
(But none of them appear in the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition)

Deirdre wonders why Rob wants to marry her daughter:
"Tracy is like asparagus, an acquired taste"

(except that sometimes people grow to like asparagus)

Rita is overcome with grief when she learns Tina has died:
"I shall miss you till the end of my days"

(unlike Dennis whom she will not)

Carla summarizes the egregious behaviour of Peter:

"You copped off on our wedding day"

(yes, but on the plus side, wasn't it a lovely ceremony?)

Tina's last words to an angry, desperate Rob:
"I was born gobby"

(Do you mean the house elf in Harry Potter... or something else?)

Eileen warns Michael as he begins his relationship with Gail:
"Any man who spends time with Gail, well they usually end up dead" 

(also, she does tend to be a bit clingy at times)

Yasmeen, matriarch of the Street's newest family, gets the lowdown on Leanne's past:

"An ex-prostitute, drug user, arsonist?  Is that your CV?"

(just wait till you see her LinkedIn page)

Rita's touching eulogy for Tina:
"She brought joy to my life... Tina, rest in peace, darling"

(Amen)

Jim 'The Landlord' McDonald meets Peter in prison:
"Welcome to the big house"

(My name is Jim and I'll be your sommelier for this evening - and the next 10 years)

Ken finally returns to The Street and announces his big news:
"I've become a vegetarian" 

(You mean you'll never eat another hotpot?)

Ken tries to boost Peter's spirits:
"They can prove you're an alcoholic, a bigamist, an adulterer - but you're not a murderer"

(I guess one out of four isn't bad)

Carla to Peter:
"I still think of you as a liar and a cheat and I still hate your guts"

(So, I guess that means no apres-prison sex?)

Happy New Year from all of us at Blanche's Polish Hip!