Sunday, February 12, 2023

Coronation Street Catch Up: the shepherd of the anus edition

 your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...


Exit Jacob.

Yes, the likeable lad was forced to become a drug coordinator by his evil Dad (Demon, er, I mean Damon) at the Bistro. Jacob is not happy to return to dealing drugs but Daddio leaves him no choice. Panic ensues when Craig dines at the Bistro with some copper colleagues including a personable sniffer dog (BAFTA nominee?). 

Jacob scarpers from the Bistro with a drug package and flushes it down the bog at his flat. He narrowly escapes the clutches of the canine sleuth. Phew! ...except Damon isn't too pleased at the loss of drugs. He beats Jacob and tells him to get lost.

Jacob is in bits and tearfully departs leaving Amy disillusioned and broken hearted.

Elsewhere, things aren't going too well for Summer. She discovers that Mike had an affair and she meets Eva, the woman in question - along with Eva's (and Mike's) secret baby. Whoa! Summer is gobsmacked and confronts Mike who promptly locks Summer in the upstairs nursery lest she spill the baby beans to Esther.

This doesn't work out very well as Summer, deprived of her diabetes meds, passes out and has to be rushed to hospital where the TriDads (Billy, Paul & Todd) converge and finally learn the truth about what's going on. Needless to say, Summer has now decided not to be a surrogate.

Daisy and Daniel's wedding plans continue along a rocky road, especially when Daisy cozies up to a local DJ whom she wants to do the music for her wedding. One snag. The DJ is now besotted with the fair Daisy and that could be a problem for her - not to mention Daniel.

Ty and Fiz discover that Hope has been secretly listening to John Stape's lessons on cassette tape. Fiz resigns herself to the fact that Hope wants to know more about her biological father (even though he was a serial killer) and they begin a frank mother and daughter dialogue.

Speaking of killers, Stephen is still hanging around the Rovers like a bad smell, trying to ensure that Ted doesn't regain his memory and create problems. On top of that, Stephen seems to have impressed Rita with his smarm charm - so much so that Rita thinks Jenny should get together with him. Yikes!

And now for a few lines from the week that was: 

Glenda to Daisy re: her wedding gift idea:
"There's no such thing as too many towels"
(certainly not with the number of people living at Ken's house)

Rita to Jenny re: Stephen:
"That's what I call a gentleman"
(I can think of some other names)

Bernie to Aaron and Billy:
"I'm a massive fan of the Egyptians"
(yes, she loves pyramid schemes)

Bernie recounts the moniker of her friend who dabbled in alternative medicine:
"Shepherd of the Anus"
(bummer)

 Rita to Jenny re: Stephen's help moving a bunch of old clothes:
"He was more than happy to do all the humping"
(care to re-phrase that?)

Daisy gives Daniel an ultimatum:
"We get married this year or I find someone else to marry"
(Kirk is already taken I'm afraid)

Leanne is looking for a new perfume after comments from Nick:
"Kennel Number Five"
(eau de canine)
***

Well, chippie chappies, so ends another week. Sorry to see Jacob leave and sorry to see Damon sticking around. Thanks for stopping by and have a great week!

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