Coronation Street Catch Up: the stale sex life edition

 your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

One heavy duty hole punch: $50.79

One roof box: $749.00

Desperately throwing rocks to make the roof box sink in the canal: Priceless

Stephen is now officially a serial killer but he's certainly no Cool Hand Luke. More like Shaking All Over. 

It all starts when Ted begins to regain his memory. This leads Ted to accuse Stephen of lying to him and Ted  realizes that Stephen is responsible for the disappearance of his son, Leo.

Stephen manages to lure Ted into the empty factory where Ted confronts a quaking Stephen with the truth. As Ted turns to head out and call the police, Stephen grabs a hole puncher (extra heavy) and clobbers Ted. Somehow, Stevie Blunder manages to place Dead Ted into a roof box (Thanks Thule!) and, with the help a few helpful (and unsuspecting) neighbours, manages to place the roof box on top of Audrey's car.

Phew! 

Except... Audrey needs her car to visit a friend in the country. So Ted gets a nice tour of the Peak District before a sweaty Stevie manages to reclaim the auto and drive to the canal where he manages to slide the roof box into the canal. 

But... much like Ivory soap, the roof box sarcophagus floats for awhile until it finally submerges and Stephen appears to have bumbled his way through another homicide (that's two... and counting).

Elsewhere Daisy is getting freaked out by the mysterious secret admirer (stalker?) who keeps sending her flowers. Daisy excoriates the troll on social media except, oops, she outs the wrong guy. The actual stalker is a random guy she met while at the hospital and he doesn't seem to take the hint about backing off. If that wasn't enough, Daisy's Mum shows up unexpectedly in anticipation of Daisy and Daniel's wedding.

Gemma is keen on getting into the child minding business and making some extra dosh, while Ches has dreams of starting a gourmet burger joint.

Over at the factory, Fiz admits to Sally that her sex life is a little stale so Sally suggests role play. Maybe Ty can be an auto mechanic and Fiz can be a customer who needs her oil changed?

In an unrelated development, Ty brings home a chinchilla as a pet for Ruby and Hope. Bad idea.

After Summer's traumatic ordeal, she announces to the TriDad that she plans to re-apply to university. This after Mike agrees to drop the assault charge against Todd, and George gives Todd his job back after discovering that Todd was protecting Paul by taking the rap for the assault on Mike.

Over at the Bistro, Nick is starting to realize just how trapped he is now that Damon is involved in the restaurant and planning to use it as a base for his illegal activities. This after Damon tells his son, Jacob, to get out of town for flushing a drug delivery down the toilet.

And now for a few lines from the week that was:

Sally to Fiz re: role play:
"Last week Tim was an airline pilot and I was a air stewardess - long haul obviously"
(So that's why Air Canada is losing money) 

Sally to Fiz again:
"Tim's been a plumber and a dentist"

(I hope he doesn't charge by the hour)

Evelyn warns Ty not to screw up his marriage again:
"Do not seek solace in the arms of another Romanian"

(I think I saw that message in a fortune cookie)

Carla to Sarah and Michael whom she thinks are surreptitiously using her factory:
"Did Bryan Adams tip you off to this?"
(I think she's running out of Canadian celebrity nicknames for Stephen)

Damon to Nick:
"I do like the word 'hence' "

(as in "henceforth this Bistro will be a drug den"?)

Ted to Stephen:
"I think you've done something to my son"

(yes, and I think he's planning an encore)

Stephen gives Michael the hole punch:
"I think I've done enough punching for today"

(who knew you could buy a murder weapon from Staples?)

Jenny to Stephen:
"I think we need to have a chat about what's in that roof box"

(preferably at the police station)

***

Well, Rovers Rancheros, so ends another week and Stephen has struck again. This time it's poor Ted who gets conked on the head with a piece of office equipment. Can Stevie's bumbling trail of murder continue indefinitely? Will he go down as the Inspector Clouseau of felonies?  I guess we'll just have to wait and see. Thanks for stopping by and have a great week!