Sunday, August 27, 2023

Coronation Street Catch Up: the mostly carrot edition

 your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...


Well it looks like Adam's Sprog Showcase (er, I mean... 'gender reveal' party) turned out to be more of a Daddy Disclosure event as he humiliated Sarah with a festive balloon announcing that the baby is Damon's.

The assembled Platts and Barlows are shocked, not only by the lack of an apostrophe in the word "Damons", but also by the surprise announcement. Adam is angry because Sarah lied to him and then Uncle Stephen compounded the problem by forging a letter of baby daddy authenticity to fool Adam.

Meanwhile Sarah is devastated and pleads with Adam to save their marriage. All to no avail. Then, just when things couldn't get any worse, Sarah rushes to the hospital with stomach pains and is informed that she has lost the baby.

On the brighter side, Todd has snagged the equivalent of a BAFTA for the dead, otherwise known as the Young Funeral Director of the Year Award. George is chuffed but his competitor (Troy) likes the cut of Todd's jib and is interested in poaching the award winner for the well known funeral services company called Death Star (no wait, that's not it) er, ah yes, Rest Easy. George clues in and offers Todd a pre-emptive pay increase.

Dev wants to commemorate the anniversary of the death of Sunita, his wife and Mom to Aadi and Asha. Things go well until Bernie keeps harping on the supernatural and attributing moved photos to the spirit world. Dev finally loses his temper and they have a falling out.

Stu and Yasmeen seem to have less and less in common as Yasmeen is spending more time with Roy and sharing his intellectual pursuits (pub trivia quiz, an Ajax exhibit etc.) Stu feels left out. However he succeeds in making Eliza a little happier by buying her a new tablet so she can Facetime her Mom who is being moved to a prison that is quite far away.

Jenny is concerned about the financial situation of her pub and asks Owen for advice. He glibly suggests selling the pub which Jenny is dead set against. However Stephen (always hanging around Jenny) suggests another approach (i.e. smaller portions of hot pot with less meat). Needless to say the idea doesn't go down well with the punters.

Ryan continues to inject himself with steroids to accelerate his rippedness and develop muscles. Carla accidentally shares a photo of Ryan's buff torso which annoys Ryan but also generates a lot of complimentary comments on social media.

And now for a few lines from the week that was:

Adam to Sarah re: her infidelity with Damon:
"You dropped your kickers for the local scally" 
(what's your point?)

Ed to Glenda re: the new meat-reduced hotpot:
"Mine's mostly carrot"
(maybe it's the vegan version) 

Dev dismisses Bernie's spirit world beliefs:
"Supernatural rubbish"
(isn't that a song by Santana?)

Dev talks to Aadi about his unconscious sleep visions:
"Like the time I dreamt I had a sexual experience with Steve"
(try getting that image out of your head)

Sarah isn't keen on Stephen's fake paternity proof letter:
"What does Richard Branson say about forging documents?"
(ask the Virgin lawyers)

Gail to Nick:
"What's the dress code for a gender reveal?"
(Blue blouse, pink pants?) 

Text written on surprise balloon at the gender reveal party:
"It's damons"
(Shocking! (where's the apostrophe!}

***
Well, patient punters, so ends another week. More heartbreak for Sarah as she is humiliated by Adam and then loses her baby.  And what's Stephen up to these days? Is he taking a vacation from serial killing? Time will tell. Thanks for stopping by and have a great week.

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