Tuesday, June 30, 2009

leg-over poetry

spoiler alert: this post makes reference to the June 29 episode on CBC

John Stape's plan to win back the lovely Fiz is moving into high gear as John-boy brings out the big guns - 17th century poets - to convince his would-be love to let him... um... revel once again in her delicate charms (get to the legover part pronto - ed).

John employs the time-tested methods of Robert Herrick and Andrew Marvell (premier league strikers? - ed). These two horny rhymesters wrote immortal lines like "gather ye rosebuds while ye may" and "Had we but world enough and time/this coyness lady would be no crime" and so on. It sounds very nice but in reality it's just hard-sell seduction aimed at getting a brother a leg-over as quickly as possible. In John's case. this not-so-subtle approach consists of trying to win back Fiz by telling her that:

1) she will eventually die so she should get back together with him pronto
2) they're together now (at Gran's house) so why not go for it while they can (also know as the 'carpe diem' pickup line on Canal Street)
3) he might die so she should get back together again with him pronto
4) didn't we have good times (i.e. before his Rosie legover) together and don't you love nostalgia

or, to put it in the immortal words of yet another poet of the genre, Marvin Gaye, "let's get in on"
To his credit, John is quite upfront about what this poetry is all about, "all urging young virgins to drop their drawers before they pop their clogs."

The key question is one of motive. Is John sincere about his desire for Fiz and does this desire come from a good place or is he being a little too calculating, too manipulative? Is he genuine or devious? The other big question for Fiz is all about trust. Can she really trust John? Will he be faithful (as he claims) or betray her again?

Pretty poetry is all well and good and the seduction dance is.. well.. seductive especially in the bucolic garden of grandma's house. Things could look very different once Fiz is back in Coronation Street with the constant reminder of Rosie swanning around in a tube top and heels. As John himself says, "reality bites"

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