Tony Gordon It's Friday: the Manchester tart edition

spoiler alert: this post makes reference to the June 2 episode on CBC

Well, fellow Corrie watchers, it's a sorry state of affairs when you can't even depend on a gigolo to be faithful. And what have we got to show for it all? Audrey's crying. Deirdre's crying (and smoking). Natasha's crying.The only person who's sort of smiling is Lewis... all the way to Barbabos. The moral of the story? Men! More specifically, Corrie men! What on earth is wrong with them? Well, I can't answer that question but I can round up some of the memorable lines of the week right here on TGIF, our weekly feature for your reading enjoyment. Off we go!

Ciaran gives Audrey lessons about running a bar in preparation for her Greek odyssey:
"I'll teach you how to make a dirty Martini"
(at the Rovers, all Martinis are dirty)


Gail tells Audrey that David is the best choice for manager of the salon:
"He can be very dynamic when he puts his mind to it"
(just look at the way he drove his car into the canal and pushed me down the stairs)


Peter watches the CCTV tape and is aghast at seeing Lewis left alone in the shop:
"Alone in the bookies, Springtime for Hitler"
(so that means Audrey is Eva Braun?)


Ken watches Deirdre's long lip-lock with Lewis on the DVD:
"It was From here to Eternity - without the beach"
(although Deirdre's bookie career is definitely washed up)


Peter tells Deirdre her employment is terminated:
"You're fired!"
(Donald Trump, move over)


Claudia summarizes Lewis' behaviour:
"The man could flirt with a lamp post"
(... only if the lamp post has enough money and likes the Greek islands)


Claudia again:
"Once a gigolo, always a gigolo"
(Lewis' motto is: semper infidelis)


Deirdre, after getting a Manchester tart in the face from Gail:
"Ken! Do something!"
(yes, Ken, run over to Dev's and buy some flour and eggs, then go home and whip up some Manchester tarts, bung them in the oven, take them out, let them cool and bring them over here, then plant one right in Gail's smug mug. Should take about two hours)


Deirdre thinks Ken regrets his decision not to sail away with Martha:
"You were wishing you were on the Norfolk broads this afternoon, weren't you?"
(Ken may know a lot of women in Norfolk but I don't think he's thinking about sex right now...)


Broken hearted Natasha diagnoses her romantic crisis with Leanne:
"You know Nick's problem, don't you? He's a metrosexual"
(you mean retrosexual, surely?)


The sad message on the back of a photo of Audrey and Lewis in Greece, left behind by the gigolo:
"I tried"
(... to earn more frequent flyer points by flying to Barbados)

***

Well, ladies and gentlemen, another week on the Street and we really can't complain. There was drama, romance, heartbreak, deception, theft, a hot DVD, a faulty remote control, a Manchester tart in the face and even a mini-catfight. What on earth will they do for an encore?  Thanks for visiting and thanks also for the kind comments and astute observations. Much appreciated. Have a great weekend, enjoy the omnibus and I'll see you here next week at the Hip. Cheers!