Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Gail Platt's Seduction Guide (50 Shades of Eh?)

please note this post makes reference to the Sept 5th episode on CBC

Here at Blanche's Polish Hip, we pride ourselves on combining entertainment with education (well, one out of two isn't bad - ed). That's why we're pleased to bring you yet another installment in our award-eligible educational series which includes hits like: How to Watch Bats, How to Steal Wine from a warehouse and Car Washing 101

GAIL PLATT'S SEDUCTION GUIDE
another in an educational series from Blanche's Polish Hip

what you will need:
- a couch
- dark chocolate biscuits
- a fireman


what to do:
- sidle up your neighbour's hunky fireman
- bat your eyes seductively (or is that just conjunctivitis?)
- offer the exclusive use of your couch (pillows, bed and body optional)
- make a lot of obvious sexual double entendres like, "Could you check the batteries in my smoke detector?"
- place a plate of dark chocolate biscuits strategically next to the couch (they don't call Gail the 'cookie monster' for nothing)
- awaken the sleeping prince with a nice cuppa (one lump or two, if you know what I mean, wink, wink)
- complete the seduction with a heaping portion of Gail's Special (followed by a heaping portion of Gail's Special antidote)
- repeat daily (or at least while Kev continues his DIY)


2 comments:

  1. Absolutely hilarious...both your comments, and this storyline! I like to see Gail and Eileen get into it with each other. I'm seeing a wee bit of self-awareness in Gail's game, I appreciate that. At this point, she seems to be just interested in winding Eileen up, it's kind of a joke...I hope. I view Gail and Eileen as the same type of person, that's why they clash. They're both madly devoted to their offspring no matter what idiotic, dangerous, sociopathic behaviour they're indulging in.
    fondue123

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  2. Thanks for the comment and it's true that the Eileen/Gail rivalry is one of the best on the Street. I never thought about it before but they do have a lot in common (although neither would admit it of course). All the best.

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