Saturday, April 11, 2015

Coronation Street TGIF: The charity auction or human sacrifice edition

a look back at the week that was on Canada's Coronation Street

Well, I guess it had to happen. Faye is having her baby. For the delivery, she has eschewed the traditional hospital in favour of the birthing flat above Dev Alahan's store, with an ad hoc lesbian midwife (not that there's anything wrong with that - ed).

Thank goodness for Sophie. On the sorta bright side, at least Anna has been informed.

Speaking of teen pregnancy, guess who's back in town? Sarah Louise Platt is back to retrieve her wayward daughter, Bethany. They're like the Gilmore Girls with more felonies and less money. Callum is flirting with Sarah. David is not amused. The Platt saga continues. I wonder how many Platts they can fit into David's house?

Elsewhere, Michelle is re-engaged to Steve. The butler auction provides Norris with a domestic slave (nothing kinky) for a day: Sally Webster (definitely nothing kinky).

Amy plays the recorder in a school performance ('My Heart will go On', but hopefully the tinnitus will eventually stop - ed). Carla's back in town and she's busy trying to make a deal with a sleazeball customer. Some things don't change.

Now a few lines from last week:

Michelle to Andrea re: Steve:
"I'm going to marry that man whether he likes it or not"
(Are you sure you don't want give Hamish another chance first?)


Tracy to Tony re: Liz's bar experience:
"She's been pulling pints longer than the Queen's been shaking hands"
(although I believe these days the Queen just does a fist bump)


Mary admires the Nazir men and tells Emily:
"They do have lovely choppers"
(so do the Hell's Angels but let's not get carried away)


Tony recalls a different image of Tracy's grandma:
"I thought she made corsets and was a right cow"
(true, but she had her tender moments)


One of Emily's church lady friends makes a successful bid for Ty the mechanic in the butler auction:
"That's my next servicing taken care of"
(you'll be good for another 25,000 km or six months - whichever comes first)


Steve overhears a ruckus in the Rovers and wonders what's going on:
"Is it a charity auction or a human sacrifice?"
(a little bit of both actually)


Michael tells Gail he wants to look more like a rock star and less homely:
"I doubt Bruce Springsteen ever looked homely"
(Michael is less of a 'Born to Run' type and more of a 'Born to Run Away' type)


Sarah Louise meets Gail's partner:
"You must be Michael the Burglar"
(that's Mr Burglar to you)


Norris tells Sally to wipe up his spilled drink:
"Butler, get a cloth!"
(At once, sir. What kind? Loin or J ?)


Bethany tells her Mom she wants to stay in Weatherfield:
"Please don't make me go back to Italy"
(and don't make me eat that gourmet food, wear those haute couture fashions and be cultured)


Tracy to Tony at the bar:
"I'll have a Virgin Mary please"
(I believe that ship has sailed. And his name is Tony, not Mary)

***
Well, Corrie cohorts, the week ends with Faye giving birth but I fear it's just the beginning of a week of rancor and anguish. Poor Anna.  She's been plagued with misfortune ever since that heartless Phelan slept  with her. Can't they give her a break? Then there's the three generations of Platts fighting with each other down the street. Thank goodness Carla is back. Anyhoo, that's enough of my whining. Thanks for stopping by and visiting. Have a great week and all the best. Cheers!

1 comment:

  1. I've been feeling very disillusioned, annoyed, frustrated, etc. with our soap addiction lately. Most of the storylines are far-fetched, unbelievable and poorly written, not to mention downright silly. So I'm attempting to cultivate a viewpoint like yours, with wry amusement, whimsy, and just a dash of sarcasm. I'm hoping it'll help.

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