Good dog, Eccles! What's that girl? You've found an attractive lady in a barge? And she's making leek and potato soup? Good girl! Who's a good doggie? Now leave the rest to ol' Kenny boy, Coronation Street's original silver fox, the Barry White of Bessie Street, the.. (that's enough -ed). Anyway, you get my point. Just when you think Kenneth Barlow has enough on his plate (Blanche, alcoholic son, Blanche, two grandchildren, Blanche), he happens to meet with a well-read, intelligent, barge-dwelling lady (a femme naval? - ed).
Their conversation was a little, how you say, stilted, so allow me to present their dialogue, along with the sexual subtext (purely conjecture on my part, of course).
Ken: Thanks, I’m sure [Eccles] she’s very grateful. We both are. You've got a charming home.
(translation: if I told you you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?)
Martha: Oh, that’s very kind of you. It could stand a good clean. It seems there’s always better things to do. Too many sights unseen. Too many books unread. Maybe I’m just lazy.
(translation: how about it sailor, after all we're on a boat?)
Ken: Oh, not at all, I know exactly what you mean.
(translation: while the cats away, the mice - and man & dog - will play)
Martha: What are they discussing now [on the radio]?
(translation: why don't you turn that damn thing off and put on some Bolero)
Ken: Does god exist?
(translation: I believe he does and he sent me a sexy, intellectual, older angel, grrrrr)
Martha: It’s all very fascinating I’m sure, but sometimes these academic jousts can be well, just that. Again better things to do.
(translation: next time you drop by, leave the dog at home, nudge nudge, wink wink)
Dear Corrie, You have outdone yourself!! Too funny!! What a wit you are. :) Mary
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