Thursday, August 18, 2011

David Platt's illness

spoiler alert: this post makes reference to the  August 17 episode on CBC

Just like every faithful Corrie fan, I stay awake at night wondering what exactly is wrong with David Platt (bad goatee karma? - ed). The symptoms so far include fainting at the the courthouse, fainting while sitting on Graeme's sofa and fainting while driving Gran's car. That's not much to work with, at least not until the doctors can take a look at his scans (while David gets scran at his Gran's).

Gail, with the medical authority of a recently-fired clinic receptionist, insists that it's epilepsy.

Tina, with the medical authority of a former girlfriend and current assault victim, says that it's "pure evil" (is that covered by the National Health Service? - ed).

David, with the medical authority of a psycho, says it could be a brain tumour.

But there could be many more causes: central nervous system diseases, irregular heartbeat, stroke, multiple sclerosis or a heart attack. Myself? I have to agree with Tina on this one. I think that the MRI and catscan will reveal a vast, dark shadow in David's head which, upon further inspection, will be diagnosed as a large area of evil (with lighter shadows of malevolence around the edges). This will explain many things:
- his suicidal car ride into the canal
- giving Bethany access to ecstasy pills
- pushing Gail down the stairs
- loosening the scaffold bolts to injure Jason
- going on a rampage of smashing cars, shops and Ken Barlow

Of course, it could also be something mundane like a drop in blood pressure, low blood sugar or allergies -- but my money's on evil. The only question left is: Is it treatable?

2 comments:

  1. Would also explain withholding pills from drug addict Joe and the countless times he's been on th opposite side of the truth and been plain nasty to folks just for the fun of it. I think though, for dramatic effect, it'll be a brain tumour that requires surgery.

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  2. thanks for the comment. I had completely forgotten about the back pain pills and his many other transgressions. It's tough to separate his sick personality from his sickness but I tend to agree that the diagnosis will be something dramatic which will of course be the cue for more hand wringing and guilt from Gail. Brace yourself. All the best, CH

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