One cup of coffee please, Sylvia

please note: this post makes reference to the Jan 24 episode on CBC

Roy's mother is appalled by the poor revenues at Roy's Rolls and she's determined to do something about it. Her plan to restore the caf to profitability is bold and involves: sausage cutbacks, bacon reductions, sticky bun rationalization and possibly layoffs (not Fiz's baby, surely - ed). Price hikes are another unfortunate reality in order to generate better returns for shareholders and keep Roy's Rolls competitive (stop the corporate wankchat and get on with it ! - ed). But what does it all mean for the customer? Well, if you buy a coffee, the bill might look something like this...

Coffee (black).....                     £1.20
sugar...................                          10p (per spoonful additional charge)
milk.....................                          10p (additional charge)
spoon rental..........                           5p (2p reimburseable upon return)
take-away or eat in fee.......            5p
cup & utensil cleaning charge..    5p
gratuity........                                    20%
smile.........                                         not included
VAT.........                                           20%
Olympic Games surtax...               5.5%
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Total charge...                             £2.35

Thank You! Have a nice day!