Friday, November 16, 2012

Tony Gordon It`s Friday: the predatory sex pest edition

please note: this post makes reference to the November 15 episode on CBC

Don`t you think it`s a bit rich for Lewis to be all hurt and aggrieved? Yes, Gail did set a ham-handed trap to suss out his true intentions, but really, that's nothing compared with Sir Lewis of Scam's track record. Audrey managed to forgive the erstwhile gigolo for: trying to steal money from her, bilking Peter Barlow, using Deirdre as a human lip gloss, running off to the Caribbean with a woman he met at an airport bar, going AWOL from a train and accumulated con man debts of 10,000 quid. So where does he get off with this righteous indignation?

Anyway, enough about Lord Lewis Archer, Prince of Perfidy, let's take a refreshing dip in some of the memorable lines of the week in the award-avoiding weekly segment we call 'Tony Gordon, It's Friday':

Ken complains to Deirdre about the silent treatment he's getting because of Wendy Flaming Crozier:
"It's hard for one to concentrate when one is in the doghouse"
(one should know that by now, Ken, shouldn't one?)

Gloria tells Lewis she is putting on a brave face despite a mysterious terminal illness:
"I'm making the most of the time I've got left"
(about 20 or 30 years)

Deirdre confronts Wendy about Ken's night chez Crozier:
"Tell us the tale of the governor's sleepover"
(well, once upon a time there was this sexy septuagenarian...)

Tracy greets Wendy Crozier with her patented charm:
"Last time I saw you, you were a home breaking cow"
(yes, but she's moo-ved on)

Tracy sums up Ken's behaviour:
"You're a lecherous ol perv, Dad"
(no disrespect and, oh, can you look after Amy tonight?)

The Lancashire Leisure judge reads from a comment card:
"If the Rovers Return were a lullaby, we'd all be asleep"
(or in a coma with a 'do not resuscitate' sign)

Wendy insists that ken was pursuing her:
"He held a torch for me like the Statue of Liberty"
(Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning for a legover) 

Stella's nemesis from the Weathy Arms extols her virtues:
"My pipes are as clean as a whistle"
(yes, but what about the pub?)

Ken tells Wendy she's ruined his reputation:
"Haven't you heard? I'm a predatory sex pest" 
(Yes, but a predatory sex pest with integrity)

Wendy is confident that Ken still fancies her:
"It's just a matter of time before you're back in my bed again"
(I wouldn't put it in your daytimer just yet)

Wendy finally apologizes for false accusations against Ken:
"I'm sorry to have turned bunny boiler"
(Bunny Boiler? Is that a new character? Sounds like a friend of Beth)

Lewis takes pleasure in Gloria's misfortune:
"You're an out of control buffoon"
(yes, but you're an aging Lothario, so let's call it even)

Well, comrades in Corrie, looks like we're reached the end of another week. Love, hate, spite, deceit ... and physiotherapy. What more could you ask for? Have a great weekend and I'll be back next week.

No comments:

Post a Comment