Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Should we have Coronation Street Updates on Coach's Corner?

please note this post makes reference to the April 22 episode on CBC

Since the CBC has bumped Coronation Street into the mid-afternoon slot due to ongoing nightly coverage of the NHL playoffs, it only seems fair that Ron MacLean and Don Cherry should provide us punters with a regular Corrie update during their Coach's Corner segment on Hockey Night in Canada.

I think it might go something like this...

RON: Okay, Don, I believe you had something to say about Beth Tinker and the issue of enhancement.

DON: Yeah, so anyways (DON'T ROLL THE CLIP YET!), back in Boston in 75-76, Bobby Orr comes to me one day and says, 'Hey Grapes, what do you think of these new, enhanced shoulder pads?' So I says, 'Whaddya need those for? You're the best defenceman in the league. Just keep doin' what you're doin' and forget about those enhanced pads'. And you know what happened? We finished first in our division that year. So forget about those enhancements, Beth Tinker. Do like Bobby and you'll do fine.

RON: And I believe you had some thoughts about Maddie living on the streets.

DON: Yeah, so here's the thing I don't understand What's so bad about living on the streets anyways? Back in 1979, I was coach of the Colorado Rockies and we were living on the streets. We didn't have no arena, no homes, no nuttin'. We were living rough just like Maddie and we almost made the playoffs. So, Maddie, get out of the Webster's house and get back on the street. That's the way to do it!

RON: And finally a word about arson for Owen Armstrong...

DON: Yeah. Okay, so.. how much time do I have?..

RON: About 30 seconds.

DON: Oh geez. Anyway. Here it is. Back in 1967, I was playing in the AHL with the Rochester Americans and I go into the corner to get the puck and I give this guy a bit of an elbow. Nuttin' serious just a quick shot in the groin. Anyway, this guy gets real mad and tries to set me on fire, RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF THE REF.  Anyway, he gets a 10-minute major and a game misconduct. The point is that ARSON NEVER SOLVED NUTTIN'. Okay? So it doesn't matter what the other guy does, do not set anything or anyone on fire.

RON: That's Donald S. Cherry and his fear... of the Flames.

- END -


  1. Just don't let Ron MacLean make any comments. He's liable to start another ethnic incident. (who'da thought it would be him?! -ed.)

  2. Amen to that. Who'd have thought it indeed). Don Cherry must be relieved that, for once, he's not the one in trouble. Thanks for the comment & all the best