Saturday, May 9, 2015

Coronation Street TGIF: the lukewarm linoleum with a hint of hotpot edition

a look back at the week that was on Canada's Coronation Street

Due to a technical difficulties, I missed Friday's Coronation Street but I have been informed that, through some miracle of modern science, Erica is pregnant. Two questions: 1) Are you kidding me? 2) Has Nick ever heard of condoms?  After the 'Kylie incident', you'd think he'd be more careful.

Anyhoo, here's what I know (should be a short post - ed). Sally wants to keep her graffiti now that it might be valuable. Jenny Bradley seems to be a nutter in the making. She's lying and hitting Maria (herself a former nutter who recovered in Cyprus) and lying some more.

Roy makes a hot curry for Luke, Gary & Ty. Roy's allotment friend stands him up. See Roy learn to drive. Run, kids, run.

Gail and Michael do get married (third time lucky - ed). Brittany? No change. Still a brat. Sarah's canoodling with Callum is outed and Nick's not pleased. Sinead is back home but hunky Sam is making Chesney jealous. Sinead is working on Alya's online clothing business. Chesney is upset.

Nick is getting cozy with Carla until Erica shows up with news of a startling breakthrough is maternal science.

And now for some lines from the week:

Michael to Fake Gavin after Gail stands him up at the altar:
"How could she humiliate me like that again?"
(practice makes perfect?}

Sally wants her graffiti to be removed even if it's cool:
"I have no desire to be down with the house boys"
(I'm sure the feeling's mutual)

Gail after Brittany gets bladdered at the wedding reception and wrecks the cake and food table:
"Nicks lovely buffet was completely ruined"
(That's nothing. Wait till Erica shows up and tells you the good news, grandma)

Roy does not like Sharif's plan to sweet talk their allotment friend:
"I have never buttered up anyone in my life"
(just toast and barm cakes)

Sarah is determined to get a job at the Rovers using her natural charisma:
"I'm going to find Steve and charm the pants off him"
(shouldn't take too long)

Norris complains to Liz about the music in the Rovers:
"I'd like some older tunes on the jukebox"
(Gregorian chants from the 9th century, I presume)

Maria to Sophie re: Jenny Bradley:
"She's a lunatic"
(no disrespect)

Carla describes the House Red at the Rovers:
"Lukewarm linoleum with a hint of hotpot"
(winner of the 2014 International Gold Plonk Award)

Carla to the slick wine rep:
"How can wine be chewy?"
(aged in casks of Juicy Fruit gum?)

Tyrone suggests a curry contest between Luke and Roy:
"The Battle of the Baltis"
(may the best nan win)


Well, Corrie Cohorts, it's 29 degrees and, to paraphrase the sublime Tim, I feel like "burying my face into a summers day."  Why is Jenny Bradley so nutty? How can Erica be pregnant? Are there no workhouses (for Bethany)? So many questions. Thanks for stopping by and visiting. Always a treat to have you here. All the best and have a great week. Cheers!

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