Coronation Street Catch Up: the poisonous hobbit edition

your one stop update on what happened last week on Canada's Coronation Street...

 

Looks like Kirk and Beth are going to have a nasty custody battle... over Peanut?

Yes, seems that Kirkie is adamant about his decision to leave Beth after odious child demon Hope snaps a photo of Beth kissing Marco and sends it to Kirk's phone, (#revenge).

Kirk moves out of the love nest and Beth is distraught. 

Similarly, Faye's 'mini-snog' with Jackson makes her relationship with Craig a little complicated. Jackson wants Faye to be with him and Miley in Slough (non-bucolic location of 'The Office') so they can be a real family. However Craig engineers an elaborate proposal event and presents Faye with a ring.

Faye says "yes" to Craig. Jackson gets a skinful and confronts Craig (before punching him). But all's well that ends well as a tearful Jackson retreats and Faye and Craig begin planning their wedding (well, mostly Craig, using a spreadsheet).

Elsewhere it's bad news upon bad news for Ryan. His injuries are revealed and he needs a skin graft (which is painful). Good job he's receiving those messages from Crystal... oh wait, those are fake messages from Daisy. BTW, Carla seems like her old self and there doesn't seem to be any more talk or concern about her mental health issues (which were the result of Stephen's LSD doping).

Speaking of Stephen, the death of Rufus has prompted a police investigation and sad sack Paul is the prime suspect. After all, he did steal Rufus' car and then got nabbed by the cops while changing the radio station in the stolen vehicle. Natch, Paul undergoes interrogation without a lawyer until Dee Dee shows up, at which point Paul has to tell her the truth about his terminal medical condition - but he refuses to use that as mitigating circumstances for the car theft.

Hope continues her antics by being rather nasty to young Eliza who has befriended Sam. Ty seems rather oblivious (as usual) to Hope's behaviour. 

As Asha plans a birthday party for Nina, it's clear that Amy is struggling to cope with the aftermath of her rape. The party turns sour as Amy watches Aaron being Mr. Life-of-the-Party. Amy leaves and later on, under the guise of cleaning up, Aadi gets Aaron drunk. Aaron passes out after which Aadi inscribes a message (in indelible ink) on Aaron's forehead: GUILTY.

And now for some lines from the week that was:

 

Faye to Craig re: his wedding dress ideas:

"It's a wedding not an orgy"

(better make that clear on the invitations)

Aaron tries to gain sympathy from Aadi:

"Who's the real victim here?"

(Amy)

Ryan to Carla:
"It's a great face for radio"
(poor Ryan)

Kirk to Beth re: peanut
"We can discuss custody once I've got a place of me own"
(Have your dog lawyer call my dog lawyer)

Beth to Faye
"That poisonous hobbit Hope"
(the bane of the Shire)

Beth tells Craig not to order a curry takeaway:
"...which makes you fart like a Clydesdale"
(Too much equine information)

Carla to Michael:
"In my experience corpses don't make good clients"
(Remind me to cancel my contract with the undead)

Yasmeen recites the Oakhill School motto:
"Rise above all and take flight"
(reminds me of Rosie Webster) 

Evelyn re: old age bathroom habits:
"You're up and down more than a bridegroom's pajamas"
(Hint: keep the bathroom light on)

***

Well, Coronation Street compadres, so ends another week. I'm hoping for some good news for Ryan. And why did it take Billy so long to help Paul with his debts? Now it looks like it's too late. Thanks for stopping by. Love to have the pleasure of your company. Have a great week.