Wednesday, October 28, 2009

pigeon condos

spoiler alert: this post makes reference to the October 27 episode on CBC

I'm getting a little nervous. (then stop watching Battle of the Blades - ed). There's a mysterious confluence of circumstances going on which bothers me (Steve getting knackered from too much sex? - ed). Aunty Pam needs to buy Jack a new pigeon coop. That's because her biofuelishness led to the disastrous explosion which destroyed the old coop. The problem is Aunty Pam can't afford to buy Jack a new coop because she's skint. In fact, she can't even work because, in her own words, her injured hand is "all to cock" (absolutely no comment - ed).

Hmm. What a dilemma. Now, normally when a rundown property is in need of a cash infusion for redevelopment, a property developer gets involved. He sees the chance to rebuild and a chance to make a tidy sum replacing grotty flats with new luxury accommodations with all the mod cons. Usually these developers are greedy, crass wheeler-dealers with no conscience and big fat envelopes of money.

Can you see where I'm going with this? That's right. I wouldn't be surprised if corporate titan, Tony Gordon, doesn't sniff out this opportunity (easy enough given the smell in the Duckworth's backyard - ed) and redevelop that pigeon coop, re-branding it as a 'luxury pigeon condo project'. Upwardly mobile pigeons (I thought all pigeons were upwardly mobile? - ed) will 'flock' to the site of the new 'Victoria Coop' to get a look at the model suite, before 'dropping' a bundle to get first dibs on these swanky cubbyholes.

Of course, Tony would have to check with his accountant before committing to such a project. And, I have a feeling that Giles might be skeptical. He might even say that this one is strictly for the.. um.. birds. (I think I need a bottle of 'Avian' after that one - ed)

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