Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Special Ed

spoiler alert: this post makes reference to the November 23 episode on CBC

Geez Louise, that Eddie Windass is something else (you mean not human? -ed). Never in the history of human skiving have so many been fiddled for so much by so few. First, there was the kitchen (by not-so-Klever Kitchens - ed), then there's the ongoing compo fraud, the auto-mugging, the darts boondoggle, the 'Wakefield thing' (whatever that is) and on and on. It's like you need a spreadsheet program just to keep track of all the scams (How about Macrosoft's Xhell? Ten quid from Gary and no questions asked - ed).
No bulls-eye, but lots of bull...

No wonder the visiting darts team (the Dread Arrows with the legendary but silent Phil 'the Power' Taylor) got so angry once they got wind of Windass (I guess it was his signature dart throw which gave him away: the famous light fixture ricochet - ed). After that, well, all hell breaks loose. I can't really say it any better than the guy from Dread Arrows who opined: "Different name, different hair, but that gimpy throw. I'd know that anywhere. Get back here you little toad. Get 'im."

Then before you can say 'hey, my leg feels all better', Eddie has legged it up a ladder above a throng of red-faced punters all screaming for blood. Turns out ol Eddie has pulled the same scam at five other boozers ( a serial skiver - ed). But the best line comes from Eddie's startled wife:
"What’s my husband doing up that ladder?" she says distressed.

Reaching for the stars, Anna, just reaching for the stars.

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