Wednesday, December 2, 2009

romantic overtures

spoiler alert: this post makes reference to the December 1 episode on CBC

Love - or something - is in the air on Coronation Street. Just look at the romantic and quasi-romantic overtures happening all over the place. There's 'Kimono' Ken and Martha, Jason & Becky and Julie's almost daily fixation with Jason's bod (Carp-e per diem - ed). Even Rita and Colin are busy making goo goo eyes at each other, but Rita isn't rushing into anything (she's got a 5am wake-up call to do the papers).

At the pub, Steve is busy having a revenge date with Natasha (Indian take-away in front of the tele while watching darts - what more could a girl want?). What is it with Steverino? Despite his average looks, cut-rate wardrobe and modest gut, he really knows how to pull the birds (sorry, I mean 'attract the ladies'). Michelle, Becky and now the fair Natasha all seem to fall for those big hang dog eyes and rubbery mug. Has he got a hypo-disc, a secret male musk, an aphrodisiac in the lager? Somebody tell me.

On the other side of the bar, Mary has done her best to stir the inner beast within Norris (a wild gerbil, surely - ed) to no avail. Despite her smokey eye makeup, Norris resists and sends her on her way with nothing more than a quick sip of Dubonnet and a pinch of the nose. What's wrong with that man? It almost makes me wish Les Battersby would come back, call him 'Doris' and thump him. Maybe that would knock some sense into him.

But surely the most sinister chemistry (apart from Anna Windass and 'uncle' Len - yuck!) is the rapport between Maria and Tony. Maria gives the T-Man a ride and there they are sitting in the car chatting about loss and love and Liam (enough alliteration; it's incredibly irritating - ed).
At one point, Tony says, "You know, if you need anything, you need me to change a fuse or well, whatever, I know you have friends and family, it was just a thought."

Now that's just plain creepy and tomorrow I'll tell you why...

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