Wednesday, December 16, 2009

UFC: Becks v. Crabby

spoiler alert: this post makes reference to the December 15 episode on CBC

UFC, you ask? (Unlimited Fights on Corrie). On the card tonight: 'Bend it like' Becky Granger versus Kelly 'Crabby' Crabtree. Let's go ringside to the Rovers and pick up the play-by play with our announcer:

"Two great fighters here, both graduates from the school of hard knocks (two streets over, near the viaduct - can't miss it). And, folks, you can bet there's no love lost here. There's the bell and they're off. Crabtree comes in for a first shot across the bow: 'I knew you when you were nowt but a stinking druggie.'

Oooh, that smarts but Becks strikes back with a quick counterpunch: "Get out of my bar."

Crabtree is on the offensive and tries another jab: 'You know it’s amazing where hard work gets you. Oh, sorry, you didn’t get here by hard work, did you? No, you got here by screwing boss.'

And it's on. Becks is in there with a 'blouse grab' and yanks Crabtree out of the serving area. What a move! First point to Granger. Now she follows up with an arm lock and the crowd goes wild. Great technique by Becks and a beautiful one-two combination.

But wait folks, it's far from over. Crabby fights back. She's out of the arm lock, turns and shoves Becks right on her bum and into the cheap seats. How do ya like them apples? Yes, sir! The crowd loves it and Crabtree is scoring valuable points. Is that it for Granger? She looks tired and Crabby is turning her back, she thinks she's won. Becks is down for the mandatory eight count, but... hold the phone... she's back up. Does Becks have anything left in the tank? Yes, ladies and gentlemen, she does. She certainly does.

Granger is back up on her feet and now she's got Crabtree in a combination face grab and choke hold. Ow! That's gotta hurt. Now Becks is really going at it. She's got the upper hand. She's got the momentum and now she's launching Crabtree out the Rover's front door like a fake-fur clad scud missile.

What a fight, ladies and gentlemen. One for the ages. And the decision goes to: 'Bend it like' Becky Granger in a decisive victory. Join us again next week when Becks defends her title against another challenger. "

1 comment: