Following the sage comments of one reader, disciplinary action has been taken against the editor for 'crimes against puns' specifically regarding the use of the term 'vas deferens'. As a result of a disciplinary review, he has been suspended from this blog until further notice (this is the first I've heard of this - ed). Meanwhile, let's move on with another award-winning edition of TGIF (Tony Gordon, it's Friday), a selection of memorable lines from the week. Andante:
Blanche makes an appearance at Peter's AA meeting and speaks out:
"I've never heard so much self- indulgent whinging in all me life"
('My name is Blanche and I'm a trouble-maker')
Blanche again, same place, same gusto:
"Is there some correlation between how boring you are and how much you drink?"
(see comment above)
Helen wants to know why Tony is speaking on behalf of Maria:
"Who are you, her spin doctor? "
(more like witch doctor, I would think)
All Blanche, all the time - still at the AA meeting:
"Ken recently had an affair with an actress. Oh, it wasn’t Nicole Kidman or Glenda Jackson. She lived on a tugboat "
(no comment necessary)
Tony having a quiet word with Barry:
"Your wife is suffocating Maria, Mr. Connor "
(That's MY job)
Surgeon explaining a life-changing medical procedure to Ashley:
"I'll be making a small incision each side of the scrotum."
(this is for the vasectomy, right? Just checking)
Tony gives Helen a piece of his mind and suggests she and Barry leave:
"Why don’t you take your toxic tongue and your tubby hubby back to the land of begorrah and bejesus? "
(Talk about the Scot calling the kettle black...)
Barry gives Maria his assessment of Mr. Gordon:
"Tony hasn’t got a heart, Maria. He’s got an agenda"
(...that's why he gets calendars on Valentine's Day)
Ashley is conflicted because he told Claire he would get a vasectomy:
"I've promised her faithfully to get meself neutered."
(Good boy! Who's a good boy?)
...and one more bonus line from Blanche about Ken & Deirdre:
"She'll be coming onto you next. They're like a pair of swingers "
My. my, what a week! Thanks for tuning in and stopping by. Enjoy the weekend and the omnibus edition on Sunday. See you next week for more of Blanche's Polish Hip.