Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Umed: the musical

spoiler alert: this post makes reference to the July 21 on CBC

I must say, I like where Umed's going with his innovative retail ideas (back to Mumbai? - ed). In fact, Dev should seriously consider making Umed a member of the Weatherfield Square Dealers Association (he's certainly got the right body shape - ed) or that other group Dev started with Prem. I think it was called WAFTA (Weatherfield Area Free Trade Association)... or something like that. The point is (oh, so there is one? - ed) that Umed is trying to drag Dev's corner shop into the 21st century by using leading-edge musical door chimes instead of that dreary old bell.

Machine gun fire sound effects and circus music is good but if the Korner Shop really wants to create an ongoing 'relationship' with its customers (instead of just selling a packet of biscuits to Lloyd), then let's take it one step further and create customized entry music for each loyal customer on the Street. How would that work? I'm glad you asked. Here's a few preliminary suggestions:

Jason? How about 'YMCA' ? (Village People)

Tony Gordon? Bad (Michael Jackson)

David Platt? (see above)

Kelly Crabtree? Hot Legs (Rod Stewart)

Eddie Windass? Hair (from the musical of the same name)

Joe McIntyre? Get back or Back in the USSR (The Beatles)

Leanne Battersby? 'Roxanne, you don't have to put on the red light' (The Police)

Fiz? Jailhouse Rock (Elvis)

Jesse? 'Mamas don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys' (Waylon Jennings)

Eileen? 'Jesse's Girl'... for the moment anyway (Rick Springfield)

Kirk? Er, let's just stick with the machine gun fire...

Anyway, you get the idea. Can't wait to see what Umed has 'in store' tonight. Nudge. nudge. (yes, I know, I know, stop with the bad puns). Thanks for the nice comment. Laters.

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