Tuesday, March 1, 2011

No shambolic funeral for Blanche Hunt

spoiler alert: this post makes reference to the Feb 28 episode on CBC

Blanche has made her wishes known regarding her funeral and is speaking out from beyond the grave in the form of a letter which describes, in great detail, what she does and doesn't want in her funeral arrangements. And Blanche, bless her, knows what she's talking about. She's been to more funerals than I've had hot suppers. In fact, she's had a lot of hot suppers at funerals. Going to funerals was Blanche's hobby and, as a result, she has thoughtfully compiled an 'A' funeral (what she would ideally like) and a 'B' funeral (what she'll settle for). I've taken the liberty of adding a 'C' funeral just for fun. Let's compare:

Type of funeral
A. Christian burial with full service
B.  Burial with modest service
C. Cremation at that shifty place on Rosamund Street

Funeral music:
A. Scots Guards playing 'How great thou art'
B. Branny from knitter natter plays the recorder
C. Lloyd plays some of his Northern Soul CDs

A. C of E Minister with a nice baritone at the church
B.  May from the One O'Clock club
C.  Simon reading the eulogy he wrote for Leanne (the rabbit not the ex-escort)

A. Four-Star hotel with hot and cold buffet
B. Rovers with Elliot pies and sausage rolls
C, Kebab shop (hot sauce not included)

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