Holy Communion, Batman! Look who's back! Terrible Tony Gordon is doing just fine thank you. He's being a model McInmate. What's he doing, you ask? Oh, just the usual: going to mass, wearing comfortable duds, being sociable with his fellow cellmate (you mean Roy Cropper's stunt-double, no doubt serving time for protecting the endangered Northern vole? - ed) and smuggling in a SIM card for his cellphone.
Hold on! Smuggling a cellphone into jail (wonder if he's with Telus or Rogers? - ed) What's Tone up to now? Hasn't he learned his lesson? Well, maybe the phone is jut a bit a fun, you know, something to pass the time. Maybe he'll just use it to make a few prank calls ("Hello, have you got Prinnce Albert in a can? Well, guid God man, you'd better let him out!" Click).
Or maybe he just wants to catch up with his old mates? ("Hello Jimmy, remember me, Tony Gordon, the guy who hired you to run Kevin Webster out of business, run over Liam Connor and kill my wee wife?")
Or maybe he just wants to make amends ("Hello Roy Cropper. TG here. Look, laddie, I'm sorry about pushing you in the longitudinal loch. BTW, how's your lovely manwife? Och, sorry to hear that.")
Or does Tony have something more sinister in mind (like saving Underworld or it's soon-to-be leaky roof subsidiary: WaterWorld? - ed). I'll bet ol' Tone has something nefarious up his sporran. Can't wait to find out what it is.
shot from the hip: have you noticed how all the imprisoned Corrie folks are taking centre stage on the show lately? First Gail, then Tracey and now Tony Gordon. It's like watching 'Prison Break' -- without the weightlifting and the shower scenes...