Friday, October 11, 2013

Coronation Street TGIF: the sanctimonious cow edition

please note this post makes reference to the October 10 edition on CBC

Another week of developments on the Street. Stella's moving on. Nick's waking up. Michelle's leaving Underworld. Tim's staying in. Surely avoiding Sally can't be this hard? Let's get on with it and look back at some of the memorable lines of the week.

Sean to Eileen about the benefits of Eva and Jason's union:
"Imagine the babies"
(pouty,high maintenance contractors with fit bodies?) 

Peter gives his management spiel to Michelle:
"You're still a valued member of the team"
(And by 'team', I mean me)

Dev encourages Stella to follow her dream:
"You're a free woman so think the unthinkable"
(you mean like buying really comfortable underwear?)

Michelle to Ryan after he wakes up from another night of drinking
"You smell like a brewery"
(Hops spring eternal...)

Audrey is pleased to see the back of a loquacious customer:
"If I have to hear another story about her incontinent cat, I think I'll scream"
(don't tell Andrew Lloyd Webber or he'll make a Broadway musical about it)

Sean gives Peter some info about a gay customer:
"Make sure you've got a nice handy stash of fig rolls"
(any alternative lifestyle expert would know that)

Tim tells Sally he has not seen 'Brief Encounter' but...
"I have seen 'Briefs Encounter'"
(It's just like the original but without clothes)

Michelle tells Carla that Peter is just a kept man:
"Hes nodding all the way to the bank and your bed"
(tell me, where can one get one of these 'nodding' jobs?) 

Carla to Peter re: Michelle
"Sanctimonious cow!"
(coincidentally I believe that's what her tattoo says)

Stella is having difficulty finding a buyer for the pub:
"The market's more depressed than I am"
(So Karl caused the recession?)

Kylie is upset that David went AWOL during the clergy visit:
"You know I don't do vicars"
(Thank God for small blessings!)

Roy to Hailey:
"My Hailey, my only love"
(can't think of a better way to end the week)


Well, ladies and gentlemen, that's it for another week on the Street. What will Nick say now that he's out of his coma? How will Steve come up with the dosh to buy the pub (again) and does he get Aeroplan miles or something each time he buys it? Will Michelle, Ryan and Katie get jobs? Only time will tell. Have great weekend and may all your turkeys come with all the trimmings. Cheers!

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