please note this post makes reference to the June 12 episode on CBC
(the fake transcript of a long distance phone call from someone in Coronation Street to Canada)
Yes, it's me Deirdre, your wife. How's Canada? What's that? You're watching Stanley's Cup? Who's Stanley? What? Well, never mind. I hope your son is feeling better, you know the one who's been having blackouts every time he sees Rob Ford on TV. Isn't that strange?
Anyway, just thought I'd give you a dingle to let you know how things are around here. Everything's fine. You know Rob and Tracy opened their own shop and things are going well. They're selling lots of dodgy hair dryers.
Oh, and Rob and Tracy also got engaged. In fact they had their engagement party last night at the Rovers. It was a lot of fun except, after the party, Tina McIntyre was found unconscious on the street after falling from a balcony and getting hit on the head with a pipe.
Peter? Yeah, Peter's fine. Well, I say fine. He had a bit of a relapse with the booze and Carla put him into rehab. Yes, he's out now. But then went right back on the booze again. But, on the plus side, Carla's pregnant. You're going to be a granddad... again!
Yeah, it's wonderful news, although there is a slight wrinkle. Well, you see Peter was having it off with Tina. No, there was no bigamy involved this time. How's Carla taking it? Hard to say because she was arrested for the attempted murder of Tina. No, no it's fine. They just released her. Anyway Rob and Peter and Tracy are all staying at ours for the moment. Of course, Rob says Peter was the one who tried to kill Tina so it's a bit tense right now round the dinner table.
Anyway, must run. I have to take Eccles for a walk, buy a new belt and then make my famous fish pie. Ta, love. Give my best to your son, you know the one whose name I forgot.