Saturday, June 27, 2015

Coronation Street Weekender: the Eau de Halibut edition

a look back at last week on Canada's Coronation Street

Ahoy mateys! Lloyd's back from his excellent adventure on the seas of Norway smelling like Eau de Halibut and recounting fascinating tales of marine anim.....zzzzzzz. Sorry, I must have dozed off.

In other news, Sophie tries to get over the loss of Maddie. A counter-culture yoga smoothie with a penchant for smoothies (Talisa) shows up on Dev's doorstep to stay for a while, much to the chagrin of Julie. Don't worry, she and Dev are just good friends. Or so he says.

Crazy Jenny Bradley kidnaps Baby Jack but Rita steps in and discovers her geolocation. Jenny does the baby-on-the-balcony fandango (A Corrie staple - ed) but good sense prevails and a completely unperturbed Jack returns to his Lego.

Gail tries to make up with Michael who is in hospital undergoing a procedure (a Gailectomy? - ed). David and Kylie pretend to be a happy couple (at least they've had lots of practice - ed) to thwart Callum's custody plans.

Alya is being reckless following the death of her father and the 'episode' which briefly hosptalized Sharif. She's desperate to get drunk and have it off with any bloke with half a brain and a pulse. But she settles for Jason. What could go wrong?

Last and definitely least, Ty, Kirk, Luke and Chesney get embroiled in a quest to steal t-shirts from a garage. The caper goes awry when Chesney is left behind and has to hide from the t-shirt thugs. Remind me never to buy a Muleface t-shirt (although, it would be descriptive of your features. Just saying - ed).

And now some lines from the week:

Sarah summarizes Kylie's past:
"Cage dancer, drug addict, unfit mother"
(have you been reading her LinkedIn page?)

Liz to Erica re: Nick:
"You're pining for the Bistro Boy"
(Wasn't he Batman's sidekick?)

Mary tells Talisa that she too is proficient at yoga:
"My crescent moon was the talk of the community centre"
(and that was after the yoga class)

Mary doesn't like Talisa:
"That vegetable bothering double-jointed interloper"
(don't hold back. Tell us what you really think)

Julie lists her two favourite movies:
"Mary Poppins, 9 1/2 weeks"
(these are a few of my favourite schwings)

Maria to Kylie:
"I know what it's like to have everyone hate you"
(thanks for the good thought)

Jenny Bradley to the police after her kidnapping escapade:
"I don't know who I am anymore"
(don't worry, the police have you on file)

Kevin to Tim after his experience with Jenny Bradley:
"I'll never trust another woman again"
(well, that will certainly cut down on future story lines)

Alya to Gary:
"Take me to bed"
(that's an order, soldier!)

Lloyd shows up in the Rovers to talk about technological change in halibut processing:
"Olaf says it's completely revolutionized the fishing industry"
(Two questions: Who's Olaf? and "Where'd you get that cap?")

Alya to Jason:
"I'm sick of being good, aren't you? 
(Funny, that's what Voldemort said to Harry Potter)


Well, Corrie comrades, so ends another week on the Street featuring a nutter (Jenny), a sailor (Lloyd) and a legover (Alya & Jason). Let's see what happens next week after Alya realizes what she's done (drinking an illicit San Pellegrino). Hope you have a great week and a festive Canada Day. Thanks for stopping by, thanks for the great comments and all the best. Cheers!

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