Tuesday, February 9, 2016

Coronation Street meets Grand Designs - part one

As you may know, Grand Designs is a British television series hosted by Kevin McCloud about unusual home building projects.

The show has been airing in Canada on CBC since last September. So, it's only natural to wonder what would happen if one of Kevin McCloud's future episodes were to involve Gail Platt's underfloor heating project. 

I think it might go something like this...

Kevin McCloud:  Hello. Sometimes a building project comes along which such boldness of vision and uniqueness of spirit that you have to simply stand back and say, "crikey, this takes my breathe away."

This is not one of those projects, but we had a crew here in the beautiful, gritty, nouveau urban landscape of Weatherfield and we happened to notice a skip in the street so we stopped the truck and, well, here we are.

Gail Platt, or Rodwell, or McIntyre, or something, is a woman with a warm vision and cold feet. More precisely, she wants to put underfloor heating in her new granny flat. The only problem is she has very little money, only a month to do it and, to make matters worse, her psycho son David is dead set against the project.

With all that going on, one wonders if Gail's granny flat will turn out to be, well, cold comfort.

Gail: Actually Kevin, it's not a granny flat but rather an 'annex' and it's a very nice garage conversion which Jason the Builder did while I was away in Milan on a mini-break. The only problem is that the floor is quite cold and I've asked Jason to give me an estimate for the installation of underfloor heating.

Kevin: Ah! Right. Well, underfloor heating sounds rather ambitious and would mean, of course, digging up this magnificent heritage concrete floor. What's your budget and your time frame?

Gail: Well, Kevin, an electric system costs about £100 a metre. Of course, there are additional costs like insulation, heating controls and electrician fees. So my budget is about £2,000 and I'd like it done in four to five episodes - I mean days.

Kevin: Wow! And, of course, that doesn't take into account any delays or problems you might run into - like your psycho son - for example. Looks like we're in for an exciting show with the usual budget overruns, contractor problems and delays - just like every other show we've ever done. Can't wait!

(catch part two of Coronation Street meets Grand Designs right here tomorrow)

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