Saturday, July 30, 2016

Coronation Street Catch-Up: injury at the kebab shop and I falafel

a look back at last week on Canada's Coronation Street.  

Well, first the good news. Leanne is pregnant. Congrats to the Mom-to-be and the... er..mystery Dad (Norris?).

Then there's Todd and Rev Billy who seem made for each other like mass on Sunday, or vespers in the evening, or Henry VIII and schisms. Todd even manages to entertain the bishop with a bottle of wine and his pithy observations on the state of the church (ever thought of replacing those boring sermons with YouTube cat videos?)

Michael is back (yawn) and back with Gail (double yawn). Freddy is trying to play matchmaker with Audrey and Ken but it's not working. I don't know why Audrey's so keen on Ken, especially since she thinks Waiting for Godot puts the 'stench' in existentialism.

Then there's Caz, whose limpy foot charade is discovered when she tosses a yobbo out of the Rovers (whoops). When Kate discovers the lie and finds out that Caz has a date with a court martial, she dumps her.

And finally, Kylie convinces David that they need to move away to start a new life for their family. Barbados comes to mind and sister Becky tells them there's plenty of work in the Caribbean for a manicurist/cage dancer and a hairdresser/psycho so they're ready to go.

Except that Kylie intervenes in an altercation between Gemma and thuggie Clayton (of Dog and Gun fame) and poor Kylie gets stabbed.  Yikes!

And now for a few lines from the week that was:

Michael consults Todd the florist to buy flowers:
"I'm looking for something cheap and cheery"
(have you looked in the mirror lately?)


Todd to Rev Billy:
"Come in and see my bird of paradise"
(then have a look at my flower arrangement)


Sinead to Gemma re: the kebab clientele:
"Not everyone who eats a kebab is drunk"
(no, but it helps)


Gail to Michael re: his affair with Eileen
"You were the one who dumped me for the Weatherfield bike"
(so that would make Phelan the bicycle thief?)


Gemma recalls the wrong words to a song
"We built this city on sausage rolls"
(makes more sense than the original lyrics) 


Michael indicates his Indian food preferences to Gail:
"I like my curries like I like my women: delicate and sweet"
(Oh boy! Can we get this guy a one-way ticket back to Brighton?)


David reacts to Kylie's suggestion to go live with her sister Becky:
"We're not moving to Bar-flippin-bados"
(what about Ber-flippin-muda?)


Thuggo Clayton tries to get away from Kylie after assaulting Gemma:
"Let me go you bitch"
(he's quoting a Kanye West lyric no doubt)

***

Well, fellow cobblestoners, looks like a sad day in Weatherfield as Kylie suffers a serious knife wound. This doesn't look good.  Thanks for stopping by and have a great week.

2 comments:

  1. I'll never be able to see a Becket play the same way again, and as for eating a falafel....!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks for the comment and I do hope I haven't ruined your appetite for absurdist theatre and middle eastern snacks. All the best.

    ReplyDelete