Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Audrey Roberts' birthday

spoiler alert: this post makes reference to the May 10 episode on CBC

Here's a thought: planning a birthday party for Audrey Roberts' 70th birthday is a bit like the Titanic sailing towards an iceberg (without the Celine Dion soundtrack? -ed). Only the most numty person would even consider something like this. Enter Natasha, the Queen of Bad Choices (Nick, Tony Gordon etc) who seems to think that a 70th birthday party for someone who won't even admit to being 40 -- is a good idea.

Then, to make matters worse, she phones up a random assortment of punters (from Audrey's phone book) - alive (Archie Shuttleworth) or dead (Fred Elliot), it doesn't seem to matter. I'm surprised she hasn't tried to call Stan Ogden or Annie Walker.

But never mind the guest list, can you picture the festivities at the Rovers? My God, Audrey will be mortified. And the jokes? Once everyone discovers the true age of 'Aud', the one-liners will be coming thick and fast. I can just imagine the things people will say like:

"When Audrey was born, they didn't use the expression 'let's not reinvent the wheel'... because it hadn't been invented for the first time..."


"They were going to bring Audrey's long form birth certificate, but the stone tablets were too heavy..."

or.. (er, that's enough, we get the idea - ed)

The point is: there is no way that a birthday party is a good idea even if it is Natasha's goofball way of trying to push Audrey into 'early' retirement -- just so she can redecorate the salon in black, white and chrome. By the way, that's another bad idea.

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