Thursday, June 4, 2009

Tony Soprano or Tony the Tiger?

spoiler alert: this post makes reference to the June 3 episode on CBC

All I can say is: Tony, Tony, Tony. The rag trade mogul (and Carla's fancy man) now seems to have quite an appetite for unscrupulous business practices. Not only that, but he seems to be building his crooked empire on several fronts. He's such a busy guy that I don't know where he finds the time to run Underworld, supervise Rosie and keep Carla.. um.. satisfied (that's enough of that - ed).

However, for a grade 'A' evil business guy, Tony seems to be spending an inordinate amount of time on projects which are yielding rather small rates of return. I think his auditors would be disappointed with his lack of productivity.

Let's take a look at the Kevin Webster Intimidation file, for example. Mr. G seems to be spending huge amounts of time and money trying to 'convince' the stubborn Kev to leave his garage. In the process, he seems to have added dozens of people to his payroll just to get his hands on a grotty backstreet property. He's hired a thug, an entire low-cost garage to undercut Kev's prices, a sexy female driver in distress and even a high-priced thief to steal Kev's tow truck. Can you imagine the overtime and per diem expenses? (And that doesn't even include the cost of new micro-halter tops and other tarty clothes to keep Rosie Webster happy)

Then there's that other time-consuming project which involves throwing a poor, old man and his pet on the street. Tony needs to do that pronto so he can build some more luxury flats. But, rather than give the guy a fair price and a nice new home, Tony has opted for a more long-term strategy: making fruitless visits to the old man's house, sitting outside in his car and eating BLT sandwiches with Jason.

(On the other hand, Tony did manage to deal with Roy Cropper and the endangered bats - although it's probably not an issue you'd see on the agenda of most underworld crime bosses)

Well, I suppose every business tycoon has her or her own particular style. I just can't decide whether Mr. Gordon owes more to Tony Soprano or Tony the Tiger.

No comments:

Post a Comment